If a face could launch a thousand ships, then where am I to go?

2011-09-16T11:24:00.000+08:00

It's been two weeks since my last post, I guess?

I was pretty busy these days, apparently, studying.... So, yeah, I've finally turned Seventeen! Yay! Many people asked me if I celebrated my Birthday? Not really. I prefer it simple though, and yes I know It was my Seventeenth Birthday! I should have celebrate it merrily! :) But, sad to say, I have my English papers on my Birthday! So, I've spent my time for these two weeks, relaxing, studying.... And hoping for the best for my forthcoming papers. I swear, I have to reach my target! Gonna work hard!

2011-08-28T10:59:00.001+08:00

She's back.

Hell yeah, Today is the fresh start of my life! I am gonna relax for the whole day today before really concentrate on my studies tomorrow. Geez, weekend's ending. My sorrow is fading away! I am really proud of myself. I can finally move on without him. So yeah, Although flashback still appears and haunts me, but, I am not going to let myself be affected anymore. This is my life. I am not gonna let anybody to ruin my life like this anymore. I can finally move on. No more crying! I am strong enough to face all these by myself! So yeah. Adios, going out to have lunch with an old friend. And gonna catch up some movies to distract myself! This is the fresh start of the new chapter of my life. Gotta go, gonna update some more when I've got time! Gosh, less burden. I can wear anything I want without anybody controlling me! I can go out with whoever I want without fear. What a fresh start! xx.

You too, readers. Have fun. xx.

2011-08-27T14:00:00.005+08:00

Sailed away.... Goodbye....

This is the 4th day of me being literally alone, yes, alone on my own. And it has been 4 days since we last stopped texting each other nor contacting each other anymore. We were through this time, really through. I admit, I am quite an emotional person who can not really accept the fact that you left, in the first place. But soon I realize, It might be better for both of us to walk separate ways as we can never work out together.

I have never feel such pain before in my life. But I am trying my best to stay strong. Since the split up, I have never sleep or eat or do anything properly. My books are abandoned for a few days while my National exams is in a week time. You leave me no choice. What about your promises to me? That you would help me in my studies? you left me in my most important moment and when you are having your holidays already. Which I think it is quite selfish for you to do such a thing to me. You don't even give me a chance to settle it with you peacefully, Thus, leave me in despair.

I never knew you are such a character in person.
I should have known earlier...
I should have known long ago, that you would bring me disaster in my life.
I should have known earlier, you are never the one for me.

I should have known....

But what is the point of saying all these? The future depends on my action now. While now, I don't even know how to take care of myself. How am I suppose to move on like this? People around has been questioning me. Why him? Why couldn't you forget about this guy after all these time of how he had treated you? Why are you so foolish? Why? Why? Why?

I really wanna scream and tell all of them that I, myself don't even know the answer either. This things is way too complicated. My life is too complicated. I seemed dead for a few days and I keep dreaming about our past. I swear, I miss you. Really. Even til now. But I guess, we can never work things out properly. You had chosen you leave me when I am struggling hard for my exams. But yeah, no point saying. You aren't gonna realize it. Its my exams, not yours. You aint gonna care. All you care about is your current life. Free from exams and you can do anything you want including of ruining my life when I am suppose to study for my exams but our problems have been affecting me. Have you ever thought of it? Seriously?

I really thought you were different from any other guy I know. I guess, you're not. You lied... You swore... You broke promises... You hurt me... Nothing's good.

And finally, I can actually delete your text messages in my Phone. The texts that you sent me from the first day you texted me in this iPhone. I have deleted them all, utterly. The 2 years messages. I had finally get rid of them. Never once I deleted any of the messages of yours, but I did it. I even deleted your contact number and every thing I have that reminds me of you. I discarded them off my life. Now, I just need a matter of time. I will get rid of you, utterly from my life. Just a matter of time. I will get rid of you. from my heart, and I'm gonna move on with my life. I hope I will do good for my forthcoming exams and I hope you won't appear in my mind anymore.

Thinking about it, you are actually torturing me, Why don't you realize it? Do you really wish to see me break down every single day? Or see me fail my exams? Do you? Well I don't know if you do. Anyway, We suppose to be meeting on Thursday, Friday and Today. But yeah, since we're through, I am still gonna continue my life....

How selfish you are....
You had taken half of my soul with you....

I am already very stressed because of my school work. I haven't even started drawing for my Art Prelim Paper 2. What can I do now? Things are getting pretty messed up... I don't know how to face all these anymore. You should have treated me better....

Farewell..... I admit I am really happy to have spend time with you this 2 years. But sadly, we can never work out.

{updated @ 6.48pm}
Well, he texted me.. I was happy initially, but he was accusing me for hacking his account? How could he? I cried straightaway. Did he care? No! FML.

What did he care about? Seriously... I am already so tired. I even requested properly whether we could talk about this nicely through SMS. But he refused to. I don't know what to do anymore. Gotta move on. Bye.

Adios. Love.

2011-08-21T00:19:00.003+08:00

Changes.

I don't know why, but I am in the mood of blogging recently. I even changed my blog skin and so. And it looks so new and fresh. Compare to my previous blog skin. I really love my current blog skin. Simple and yeah, pretty. :D I ate a lot in the evening at Chomp Chomp Food Centre in Serangoon and yet I think the money spent was totally worth it! I gained weight, I suppose, which is a total disaster for me. My exams are like around the corner, but yet I am relaxing and slacking too much this week. I didn't even touch any books. I swear, I will wake up early tomorrow and start brushing up on my subjects! It's middle of the night, and I'm still awake. Shall get rid of my distractions away and hit the bed, getting ready to turn in. :) I'll post more tomorrow, if I have the mood.

(updated @ 3.58pm)
I woke up late and my study plan was literally ruined, as I wasted 4 hours doing nothing. But yeah, I am revising through my Social Studies by writing notes and draw mind map now. It helps me a lot in memorizing. By looking the date, It was exactly two years ago, when I first saw you. Sigh, I am trying not to think about any thing now. Just wanna concentrate on my studies, but my hands are itchy to update my post on my blog! :)

I am feeling literally depressed recently. Too many obstacles I have to face this year. 2011 has been a terrible year for me. I couldn't imagine how horrible can 2012 be. I just want everything to be as smooth, not as horrible as it is now. I am getting crazy soon! I really miss the old old old old us! Exactly 2 years ago! Nostalgia as usual. I really miss the good old times with you, what about you? I miss you though....

Sigh....... Shall continue my revision now. Adios :)

2011-08-20T15:16:00.002+08:00

Fragile.....

Every time I look at the old letters, old messages, and those chat history I had ever have with you. I feel really broken, I feel lost as well. In our very own world. To the world when we were close to each other. When I look at the way we are now, I am feeling desperate, even more.

Flashbacks and memories about of our past keep appearing in my mind. The way you treated me before. I know there is no point saying all these in here. You can never go back to be the old you anymore.

I tried to stop thinking about the old you, and move on instead of being stuck in the past with you. The friggin old memories are haunting me every single day. I tried to keep myself busy by studying so I could get rid of any thoughts about you in my brain, away from me. But I just can't. Every single place in Singapore reminds me of us. The old us. Why can't you change back like the way you were last time. The very first time when we know each other? Isn't it better?

Now, I do think that being a friend to you is much better than being someone else. I just wish I could turn back the time the 2009. I hate this year, I hate 2011. This year is full of obstacles, and I swear they are killing my brain cells. Why can't we be like last time? Don't you want it as well?

Sigh.... My life in this foreign place is tough enough.
Plus the obstacles I am facing throughout the whole year since January. I feel like giving up of my life now. There's no point struggling and fight the fear by myself anymore.

I used to get stress up very easily that I love to go around Singapore, just to try dig out every single bit of memory left in certain places. You don't know how much you mean to me. You'll never know.
I'll never be your somebody.....anymore......

And yeah, am damn freak out now. Exams are around the corner, and I haven't really prepare well yet. I didn't even study this week. Pull up your socks, Vivian!!

Ohwells, I would love to share about my best life experience throughout the year. Meeting B1A4 in real life and actually had talked to them in person, in reality as well.

On 7th August 2011, was the day of the boys first arrival in Singapore and waved around to greet their fans. It was awesome, I could actually see their close-up faces in the airport.

On 8th August 2011, I went for their Meet and Greet session for our Autograph session with Chrisen. It was totally insanely incredible. I held hands with all of the members and also, Gongchan had stole my heart from that day onwards. Iluma was the place where the Meet and Green session was held.

On 9th August 2011, we went for their showcase at Suntec City, The Rock Auditorium. Magnificent Showcase was held in there. And I miss the boys thoroughly by now. They are one of the most friendly boy band I had ever liked. Still envy those fangirls who had the chance to went upstage.

On 10th August 2011, we stalked the boys at Universal Studios, and yeah last eye contact with the boys!!! All of them waved at me. and Sandeul said Hi! I was totally high and crazy as well. And also stalked them at Changi Airport, Terminal 2. And they stopped by and gave us Goodbye speech! :D
I miss the boys......

B1A4, 보고싶어~ 비원에이포~~ ^^ 사랑해요~ ㅋㅋㅋ

B1A4 ~ :D I miss you guys! I will be waiting for you boys to come back to Singapore again! Forever BANAs!! :D

2011-08-16T19:04:00.003+08:00

TRUTH.

I've finally known all the hidden truth. There's a quote saying, "You can lie, but the truth doesn't disappear." After have a long long long thoughts about us. I've finally made a final decision which is better for both us. So both of us do not have to suffer like this anymore. You can speak to other girl so gently without any rude remarks or sarcasm. Compare to the way you talk to me. Total heartbreaker. I don't know how to love nor trust anymore. Maybe It is better for us to be just friends and nothing more like before, when we can laugh, joke and talk nonsense whenever we want without worrying or being awkward like now.

I know one day when you are looking at my blog, you will notice this post. But yeah, I'm trying not to complain too much to you. I just have to keep it to myself. You have been hiding a lot of things behind my back without any intention of letting me know at all. You have been so afraid to tell me about anything related to her, or anybody. Why? Anything wrong about that? Recently I've noticed something. After a few months of "being" with me or whatever, you still can be bothered to keep in contact with her. Whatever it is. I am feeling extremely broken now. I tried to ignore you. but I don't know I just can't.

Lol, so unusual of me to update my blog. But yeah, I shall end here. I don't intend to study at all for the whole day today.

If my O levels points are below 10, I'm staying in here, Otherwise, Adios! :D

I am all half-hearted. Half of my heart is asking me to stay in Singapore for some reason, while the other part of my heart is asking me go away. I know I can never run away.

I am always facing the same love issues in my life. Always. Hurt. I deserve it. I know.

2011-05-23T20:15:00.000+08:00

Life of a student staying in Singapore.

I've been sleeping very late, recently. due to studying for my Mid Year Examination. and Guess what, I look more like a panda now. I feel so distant to my loved ones: My parents, my friends, and even my laptop. I rarely even touch it anymore. I've been so busy studying for my exam for the sake of getting top in level. My aim is to achieve Distinctions for all subjects and well, of course, it was not just plain saying, I'm precisely working on it. Well, for my English Papers, I am quite confident though, same it goes to my Chinese Paper 1, but sadly, not paper 2. Paper 2 is pretty hard and I have no confident of even passing that paper. Well, who to blame? i am not a chinese-educated kid since young, so...

Well, anyway, for my Social Studies, Biology, Chemistry, Maths P1, Maths P2 and History, should be no problem at all. And I did my best for all papers except for History, Maths P2 and Chemistry. Yes, Chemistry! I know this is stupid but, I neglected Chemistry too much this term! Yes, my most faved subject! How could I? Lack of time management, of course.

Now I am quite relaxed, as tomorrow is my last paper which is: Art.

I've done my prep-board but not my final piece. I have no freaking idea of what to draw for my Final Piece tomorrow. I guess I am prepared to be doomed? Yeah.

Good news for me, I will be heading back to my hometown next Thursday. It was incredibly great, I swear. I can't wait to meet my Family members, my friends! This is gonna be great for sure! :D

Life here is always tough. I am fighting over the loneliness and stay happy. :D Just wanna quickly graduate and head to Uni instead. :D

xx, loves.

2011-04-21T19:55:00.002+08:00

どうして君を好きになってしまったんだろう...?

The same type of feeling is back! I fell in love, again, and again and again. Never change.

My blog seems dead though! XD Mid Year Examination is just around the corner. Next Thursday, i'll be facing the same old shit again. Hope I will do well for my Exams! Ganbatte, people! (:

2011-03-29T23:27:00.002+08:00

My Life's Back!

Finally, there is a WIRELESS CONNECTION is this god damn house! And I can finally update my blog with new post! In my room! Laughs, Anyway, my life isn't that bad nowadays, Wake up, Go to School, meet my friends, end school, go to the Library, sometimes alone, sometimes with outside-school friend :)

Gonna post when I've got things to share!

Ps. Busy downloading videos!

xx,

loves.

2011-03-27T17:38:00.005+08:00

Life's not as good as I expected it to be.

I did badly for my study case, as well as socializing, communicating and even dressing! My fashion sense is awfully awful. and I have no confidence in myself lately. Lack of wireless connection in my place really pisses me off my nerves, I have to go somewhere that provides wifi to actually blog! and hell yeah, I am so bored of my life.

Everyday is the same... Like single lives... But I seldom hang out with my friends either. Spending time stoning at home? Lying on my bed. My life is kinda empty. My life abroad is super boring.

Well, Since I am so so so so bored, Let me share with you guys, #100factsaboutmyself (?)

100 FACTS ABOUT MYSELF.

1. I don't know how to cook. Awful much?

2. I have problems in socializing, communicating and hanging-out. Lack of social life.

3. I have no confidence in smiling widely by showing my teeth because I hate my teeth.

4. People thinks I am talkative.

5. I am fat, but I don't know why people keeps saying that I am skinny.

6. Before I came to Singapore to study, my weight is 51 kg.

7. Now my weight is 41 kg.

8. I eat a lot and I enjoy eating!

9. I am insanely in love and adore Dong-Bang-Shin-Ki.

10. I know how to sing, but too shy to expose it.

11. I don't really know how to dance.

12. I speak Korean fluently, almost fluently, a korean friend of mine said.

13. I am Hokkien master.

14. I hate to my mouth!

15. I am short, 156 cm.

16. I love Fashion, Design, Architecture and Science.

17. Art and Science are my life.

18. But I hate to do Art. I only draw when I am in the mood.

19. I am considering Literature for my course.

20. I am good at Languages but do badly on Mathematics.

21. People said I am not a typical Chinese-Indonesian. But I am pure Chinese.

22. I speak fluent Singlish and caused people around me to mistaken me as a Singaporean.

23. I speak Chinese quite fluently but sucks when it comes to writing.

24. I write novels. ;) Both English and Indons.

25. I don't do sports. I spend my time writing, singing and slacking.

26. I swim, but I don't now due to some health issues.

27. I ride bicycle but not anymore since 6 years ago.

28. My Bahasa Indonesia is tremendously awful, trust me.

29. I hate living alone especially in Singapore.

30. I hate studying overseas.

31. I miss my family more than anyone else.

32. I owned branded goods but not addictive.

33. I drive ;)

34. I've never strip naked in a party. LOL!

35. I am studying at Guang Yang Secondary School.

36. I cope pretty well with Singaporeans, I am not a racist, please.

37. I hate certain annoying Singaporeans.

38. I am biased. I love Kim-Jae-Joong more than anyone else.

39. I listen to English songs but not often.

40. I prefer Korean songs better.

41. I have never listen to Indonesian songs.

42. I play drum, like quite expertly.

43. I dream to be a Scientist, a Chemist.

44. I dream of having a Korean boy friend!

45. I have an iPhone 3Gs and a Blackberry Onyx.

46. My friend said I am a spoiled brat.

47. I own everything I wanted to have, If necessary.

48. I've never been to the States, a sad truth.

49. I am addicted to Koi's Ice cream milk tea.

50. I have eye bags and I hate it!

51. I am possessive towards my things.

51. I am rude at certain times although I don't mean it.

52. I hate it when I am in a bad mood yet people around me doesn't notice.

53. People thought I am not a virgin! I don't know why! But I am still am!!

54. I speak many languages. A lot of foreign languages.

55. I enjoy spending time with my closed ones.

56. I can laze on my bed for the whole freaking day without showering.

57. I cry quite often. Recently?

58. I love my hair....

59. I enjoy shopping but sometimes I shop too much.

60. I can spend money like nobody's business.

61. I have many friends with different races, I am not a racist, told ya.

62. I love Indonesian cuisine! To be exact, I love spicy food!

63. I'm always the most anxious girl you have ever met!

64. I talk a lot when you really get to know me.

65. I laugh even though the jokes aren't funny.

66. I hate people with two faces!

67. Many backstab incidents happened in my life before.

68. I don't really trust anyone.

69. I talk a lot if you want to open up to me.

70. I am good at consoling people around me but not myself.

71. I don't make up unless, It is a need to do so.

72. I don't really put thick make up.

73. Apparently, my make up skill sucks.

74. I get easily touched by movies or drama series.

75. I feel like my life is like a melodrama.

76. There's only one Singaporean guy who could catch my attention. ;)

77. I hate people who come to their own conclusion without proves.

78. I hate to study.

79. I show different personalities, it depends on whom I am talking to.

80. I can be real evil, at times.

81. I'm afraid of death, ghosts, and being alone.

82. I am terribly pampered by my parents.

83. I drink water like mad.

84. I am fear of rejection. or unsatisfying answers.

85. I am not satisfied with myself.

86. I am not talented. I am just good at certain things.

87. I love guys who can play guitar.

88. I love tall guys with gorgeous smile.

89. Money isn't a big thing for me. It is Love that matters.

90. I peel my nails whenever I am nervous.

91. My iPod keeps me company whenever I am emo.

92. I am pretty vulgar when I am in Sec 3. But I am not, now :)

93. I am boyish before I came to Singapore.

94. I hate wearing skirts when I was young.

95. I have a dream of being an astronaut. It's crazy, I know.

96. When I am to engross into something, I forget about everything.

97. Man, I love movies! :)

98. I would like to play billiard sometimes If there's a chance.

99. I am not CUTE! Don't get it why people think that I am!

100. I am super uber bored and I am a random person.

Thats's it. Enjoy reading. I don't care if these facts make you dislike me or anything! :D This is me, dude.

2011-03-09T22:02:00.005+08:00

Remorse. I have to move on.

I do not think I will take my O levels Examination this year... I feel so down because I wanted to graduate faster. But, After some consideration made, I don't think by taking the Examinations this year would actually be a good idea as I am pretty sure, last minute preparation will bring me no where better. So, I decided to take it next year. And there are a few choices of courses I might like which I have difficulties in choosing the right one. Currently, I am thinking of taking Literature course in University, since poetry and novels have been attracting my attention. But my Passion is Art and Science.

Nowadays, I am quite pressurized with several things bothering my studies and sleep. As well as my daily life, But I've gotta learn to accept it with mature and fresh mindset since I am all grown up now. And for god's sake, I am sixteen this year, in 6 months time I am seventeen. I can't be so childish anymore, I can't be so stubborn and narrow-minded anymore. I promise my parents and my self. I will achieve good results and have a bright, as bright as the sun, future. It's a promise.

Anyway, My common tests results had not been good.... I am very disappointed in myself...

If I work harder, I won't feel regret like this...

I am quite excited for Friday! and March holiday is coming! :D

Later, readers....

2011-03-07T19:24:00.007+08:00

Bonjour, People. She's Back.

It's been a few months since I last posted something on my blog. And I admit, It looks so dead. So, I was about to share about my trip to Korea last winter, but since the photos are not completed yet and I don't have much time to slowly wait for my picture to be completely loaded, I am going to post my vacation story only when I am totally free and in the mood to write about that wonderful trip around South Korea. Anyway, I'm now struggling very hard for my O levels at the end of the October this year. I've started my revision since a month ago. I studied at least 2 chapters a day each subject, done 2 top school test papers a day. I know this type of preparation will bring me no where, and I know I have to buck up more!

Anyway, It's March now...

I realise, days passed like wind... It's already March... And of course, I've been studying everyday in order to proceed to a better future by taking my Chemical Analysis course. :) There are a few of my choices : Biotechnology Science, Biomedical Science, Study of Food, Pharmacist. and the most importantly, Chemist. I just love.... Chemistry so much! If I didn't score at least an A2 for my Chemistry, I feel extremely down! And I really do work hard towards my dream! To achieve good results for my O levels this year. I aim for L1/R4 10. A1 for English, A2 for Maths, A1 for Combined Science, A1 for Bahasa Indonesia, B3 for Chinese and A2 for Humanities.

People, Readers... Wish me luck! :)

My life has been pretty tough lately, I face everything on my own and settling unnecessary things all by myself. And, one thing I know, I've gotta stay strong!

I miss my family...

(taken on 28/12/10 - Nami Island, South Korea)

"The love your family has given you can never be compared with the love a boy friend can ever give you." - Quote by me, myself and I.

I really think, It is more worth it cry for my family members, to treasure my family members, If really needed, to die for them, rather than to cry for a boyfriend, to treasure someone who doesn't treasure you as much as you do, to die for a boyfriend who doesn't care. That's my point of view for now...

I am missing my hometown, But I have no choice to stay.

Later, readers....

2010-12-21T00:37:00.003+08:00

It has been almost a month since I last posted.

Honestly, I've been through a lot within two months staying in my hometown. There were bad and good things happened. And with a blink of an eye, I am leaving my hometown in 5 days. I will be leaving for korea, very soon. So unexpected. Well, Today I'm not really in the mood of blogging though...

I love being here, but yeah, Singapore is not so bad after all....

I have been hanging out with friends and family during my stay in Medan. It was fun, for sure. Especially when I hung out with those pals I really adore. :) Sadly, I had only watched 4 movies in the theatre so far. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1, Rapunzel, Tron Legacy and The Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Trader. That's all! It was like WHAT THE HELL. I AM A FAITHFUL MOVIE LOVER!

I love movies so much, Well, I bought a lot of DVD and I watched it every night too though. Recently, I am totally addicted to Harry Potter series. The Magic THINGY is totally into my mind now. :) And Look at my twitter, its all about HARRY POTTER :D

So, yeah, I am going to spend my last 5 days holiday in Medan and I am going to enjoy my 6-8 days vacation in Korea! Gonna have lots of fun! Pictures UP soon! :D

xoxo, with loves.

2010-12-09T00:36:00.006+08:00

One more time,

I am totally in love with my Prince Charming again, Kim Jae Joong! 김재중!

Seriously, I am crazily in love with him again. I've spent my evening watching Despicable Me, Happily Never After 2, and Lastly, Postman to Heaven.

Although the kissing scene of Jaejoong and Hyojoo tore me apart, but I love the story line. And I swear, Jaejoong is as cute and hot as ever! He is super sweet and It melted me down totally in one shot. I love him a lot, and this love is indescribable. I would do anything to make him mine, but it is such a miraculous yet such-a-super-impossible thing to do. He will never be mine. God damn it, I am being dramatic. But, Hell Yeah, He is always that cute-little-KIM-JAE-JOONG in my heart. My heart is all YOURS! Oh my god! How I wish you were mine since you were born! :(

I cant resist to stand his smexiest lips ever! Oh my god, how could he kiss other girl! :( Heart broken into billion pieces. I don't know what else should I comment about this. He is an AWESOMENESS in my life. Seriously, this might be super dramatic but it is the truth. Whenever I am moody or mad, I just need to calm my self down by looking at his photo or listen to his voice....... He is my ideal, GUY. :)

End of my dramatic story. I LOVE YOU! JAEJOONG!

Day 2 - Dedication to my Best Friends.

To be frank, I don't have many best friends. There is only a few in this world whom I would even consider them as my best friends. By right, best friends are very hard to find. I have a few best friends whom I think they are the greatest friends ever on earth. They laugh with me, and cry with me. Thank you for being there with me whenever I need you. I shall not mention names at all. But Whoever is reading this and you think you know who am I referring to, then, that person that first appear in your mind is the one whom I am talking about right now.

Thank you, for being the best listener ever. Whom I would trust, whom I would share my whole life time story only to you, only you who can give me good suggestion and cheer me up when I am down. You laugh with me, and you swear on people I hate with me. You are more in a mature side, though. You do not negotiate much I guess. Laughs. You spend most of your time reading comic books and novels. But I think you have changed pretty much now. I just hope we could be really good friends until the end of time. You know most of my problems. Perhaps, you do not trust me as much as I do. But I want to tell you that, I accept you as my good friend for who ever you are. I am so embarrassed to say this but I love you as my sister. I hope you can study abroad with me together in the future. Australia, remember? But sadly, your parents do not seem to support that idea of yours. Distance isn't a problem for us, right? Friendship is the most important thing. No matter how far we are apart, I would still have you as my good friend! :) All the best in the future! :D

xx, with loves.

2010-12-08T00:09:00.009+08:00

Day 1 - Dedication to my Somebody.

If you are reading my blog now, I suggest you to open your eyes wider while reading this letter :)

Well, What I can say is, You are someone special. You are someone whom I would cry for, Someone I wish to have, for my entire life. Someone whom I would want to do anything for. Someone I want to LOVE with all my heart. Someone I would wish and dream to spend my entire life with. A person whom taught me how to love a person. I always want to tell you that, I never regret of loving you. You deserve something more than love. And I don't mind giving you. You are a perfection part of my soul. You bring me happiness at all times. Even one simple text from you can bring me high up in the sky. I always want to be with you and I want to tell you that I would never ever regret of loving you. You are someone special and precious to me. You are everything to me. Really, I am sorry for all the mistakes I have done to you in the past. All the hurtful sentences I had told you. All the rude and incredibly awful remarks I had said to you before. I hope you can forgive and forget about every mistakes of mine and all bad memories to be erased. You are a nice guy, a smart guy and also an innocent guy. You know how to be good and evil at times, which makes you look more charismatic. I might be exaggerating but, this is what I see about you. You taught me many things and you helped me in a lot of things. I will never be the way I am now without you. You are my part-time parent, my part-time brother, my part-time lover, my part-time best friend, my part-time lecturer. You are always SOMEBODY to me. I will never be any luckier without you, and Thank God, I met you. You are God's most precious gift to me. Someone I would want to treasure with all my heart in my entire life. You've shown me Love and Passion.

The passionate love we share will never ever die. I will never forget the love and kindness you gave me, until the day I completely vanished from this world. To be frank, this is my very first time being crazily in love to a guy. Completely out of my mind and I would want to give up on everything for you. Maybe I sound like a mad one, but this is my true exact feelings. Nothing can change my love for you, Nothing will. Until the end of time, I want you to know that I love you. I am telling the world about how much I am loving you... Hope you feel something after reading this...

我真的很爱你, 你对我来说是世界上最美好的东西...最珍贵的东西...我爱你, 你知道吗？或许我不是很好, 或许我不知道怎么对你好不过我很想告诉你, 我没有后悔为你痛苦,我没有后悔爱上了你...而我感到很幸福,真的真的,很幸福....

with loves, xx.

2010-12-03T14:38:00.006+08:00

It is raining again! and I miss Singapore....

And I am getting more bored and bored each day...

My Macbook is getting INSANE.... And I am glad that I am getting a new Macbook Pro! Is either 15 inch or 17 inch. I think I am going to get 15 inch, Smaller and lighter. Good news is, I am going to get it next month! So excited!

Facebook is getting boring, and boring stuff is soooo not my thing anymore. I really miss Singapore. I just have to wait for another 23 days. I hate counting down days, but since i am so friggin bored. Why not?

Seriously, the internet connection here won't get any better. I am so sick of it.

Besides, I am getting more DVD every day!

CRAVINGS FOR 2011:

- new ZARA dresses!

- new CAMERA!

- Reunion with ex-classmates

- KBOX with friends!

- Pool!

- Bowling!

- Movie Date!

- Ice skating!

- East Coast Outing!

- Chalet!

- Universal Studios with Friends!

- new Macbook Pro 15"

- Blackberry Torch

Geez, I am so greedy :D

My heart is getting weaker and weaker when day passes by...

Since, I am so friggin bored... People, ask me anything at Formspring! (CLICK HERE)

2010-12-01T14:56:00.012+08:00

These six days, I've been blogging consecutively.

Because I am so super bored !

Let's make today's post GREEN, :D I love my colorful Blog !

I slept at 2 everyday, and sometimes at 4, spending my mid night hours watching those childhood cartoon and anime of mine: Pokemon, Digimon, Doraemon, Tom&Jerry and such stuff. Forgetting about my Korean Dramas because I am kind of bored of the merely same love stories. Maybe I should start searching some different genre of Korean Dramas !

Sigh, didn't expect my holiday to be so boring. Too bored that I started to create another blogging page: Tumblr. Shall try to post through Tumblr some other day. I am so irritated by my house internet connection, so lag and annoying !

Well, today is the 1st of December, which means, my holiday is going to end soon in the matter of weeks. One more month to the 2011, which means, hell is going to start real soon! My suckish Secondary 4 School life is going to start real soon. Damn it. Don't feel like going back to School. Shall skip school for merely one or two days to accompany my family members because They will be in Singapore to be with me after our Korea trip !

And seriously, this time I really hope to go to the Western countries: Perhaps, USA, Europe, New Zealand, and maybe ANTARTICA ! Cool, isn't it? Actually I am quite excited about going back to Singapore, TO PLAY ! Definitely not for studying. And guess what? I have to buck up for my studies as soon as I get back to Singapore. Gah, why should I face all these? O.O

STUDY, STUDY, STUDY. Not bored meh? (Yeah, Singlish mode ON.)

I am so planning for a KBOX outing with my pals in Singapore, Pool with some people and STEAMBOAT ! That is a must ! :D MOVIE outing as well ! There is so much more to enjoy After I am back in there again ! Seriously, Why must life in Singapore is all about STUDYING? Because we are foreigners? Yeah true. Foreigners study harder than any other locals do. Perhaps some? I am sometimes overwhelmed by remorse. Why I have to choose to study in Singapore? Why not Australia instead? The studies there aren't that stressful, I heard.

This is my fifth time complaining in my blog, and just an answer I will ever have.

NO POINT COMPLAINING.

Very true....

So, All I gotta do is to accept the FACT ! I am going to start my next year school life with freshly washed BRAIN so I can concentrate better. I promise, I won't play much during weekends, Hence, I will spend my weekends wisely, by studying.... :)

Gee, It was not like me to say this type of thing.... The Vivian I know, and you know, is a girl who is playful, who always play, doesn't even bother to touch her book... Seriously, Singapore life indeed changes some people's personality ! No matter how lazy you are, you have to study, as a foreign student, you have to study twice harder than the locals. Hence, foreign students' result has to be better than the locals !

xx, with loves.

2010-11-30T15:26:00.006+08:00

Today is such a great Tuesday, people....

We had lunch at home, and spending time watching Toy Story 2 :), I woke up quite late everyday, well, since It's a holiday, Who the hell cares? :D I am literally enjoying my holiday day by day.

I shall color my post for today in BLUE!

Yeah, I am bored. Totally bored, trying real hard to find something to do during the holiday. I always sleep quite late everyday, I slept at 4 and wake up at 12 or maybe 1 PM. Ridiculously crazy. Since I bought a lot of dvd a few days ago, I will be spending my time watching these during my extraordinary-free Holiday! :D Honestly, I have nothing interesting to, except playing around with my Blackberry or iPhone or maybe my iPod, sometimes watch Movies or Korean Dramas as well as some Indonesian TV Shows. Sometimes at night, I will have the mood to actually, watch soccer match. That's life in my hometown.

Pretty much relaxing....

Currently, I am looking forward to JYJ Newly released songs! And the concert video or maybe fan cam I would have find in youtube or some fan blogs. Due to the lousiness of the internet in my hometown, I couldn't help myself to watch those pretty boys performance video at all. And I have not even download a single song since I was back in Medan. Sucks pretty much. The internet connection here is too lousy that I have to keep in patience until the day I go back to Singapore and I swear, I will spend my day downloading all the songs that I want for such a long period of time. Recently, I am addicted to Big Bang! They're awesomely gorgeous.

So yeah, until now, It's been a month, I still don't have the god damn mood to even touch my holiday homework at all... Maybe I will start doing it next week or two weeks later... Seriously, I don't know what I am thinking. When I was in Singapore, I would be damn home sick that I couldn't think anymore. Now, I start to think that, life is Singapore is busy... and, You WILL never feel bored, even though most of time is about STUDYING.

Although, being homed is fabulously enjoyable to sleep on my comfy bed, in my lovely princess room, my perfect couches and my cupboard of DVD! as well as DBSK Album collections.... Ah, I almost forgot, My novels, and comics! I missed them since I left them a year ago.... Time has passed very fast. A few more weeks to 2011, and I all had ever wanted in this life is to,

LIVE MY LIFE HAPPILY WITH NO REGRET.

That's that....

Spending my time Facebook-ing, Twitter-ing, Blogging, Googling some un-important stuff, watching some movies, and dramas, They are totally a LIFE in Medan! :D

Another good news for me is, Dad is going to buy me a new car! I hope it will be as soon as possible because I really need one right now :)

That's enough for today's post... Well, Since I am so FREAKING BORED, I started to blog :) HEE HEE. And I had finally changed my blog skin! :) Took such a long time editing it, but I hope readers are satisfied :)

At least, It is C O L O R F U L now!

{edited @ 5.02 pm}

Let's do some quizzes since I am so super-bored right now.

01. Do you have a crush?

No, but I do have someone I love.

02. Do you consider yourself as fat?

Maybe? I am 44 kg now for Christ's sake!

03. What's your fav food?

Stingray! Definitely.

04. Do you talk to the person you fell the hardest for?

Yes I do. It's lovely.

05. Do you speak vulgar?

Yes I did, but now I don't.

06. Who do you adore the most in your life?

Is it a must to ask? The answer is always the same since a few years ago : KIM JAEJOONG.

07. What can you do if you are mad?

Throw stuff.

08. Can you drive?

Yes.

09. Where are you staying currently?

Medan.

10. Have you ever plan of studying overseas?

Yes, and I am studying in Singapore currently.

11. Do you have great interest towards soccer?

A little.

12. Are you fashionable or workaholic?

I don't really know about this.

13. Are you smart or stupid?

Neither.

14. Do you date Foreigners?

Yes. Singaporean :)

15. Can you speak Sing-lish fluently?

Ah, that, people even mistaken me as a Singaporean, How cool was that?

16. Can you speak foreign language fluently?

Like korean? YEAH, sort of.

17. What kind of place would you like to go for honey moon?

Too early to decide. But most probably Europe or USA.

18. Are you rich?

What do you think? LOL.

19. How many people you have dated for life?

I am still alive and I am not dead yet. How would I know?

20. Have you ever date the people you love the most?

Like who? Kim Jae Joong? NEVER :'( *sobs*

21. Are you a fan of branded goods?

YES! Burberry and Gucci!

22. What are you craving right now?

Superb-licious steam boat dinner as soon as I get back to Singapore.

23. Are you bored or excited?

DUH, bored!

24. Have you ever make out with someone you love?

Why ask? It is privacy question though.

25. What are things you adore in your life?

My beloved blackberry white onyx, my iPhone 3Gs, my iPod Classic, my Macbook!

26. What is your ambition?

Chemist. or Fashion Designer.

27. Do you love yourself?

DUH, yes.

28. What were you doing at 10.00 pm last night?

Thinking about somebody.

29. What are you doing right now?

Doing the quiz, duh.

30. What is the first thing you saw when you turn your head to the right?

My blackberry.

That's that, yeah. 30 Questions of myself. I am very bored..... And I am doing nothing else!

xx, with loves.

2010-11-29T23:27:00.006+08:00

So, here I am, readers....

siiiiGGHHHHH, Just a blink of an eye, A month in my hometown had passed, Another 4 weeks to go till I go back to Singapore... Honest speaking, I love being home... Being with my LOVELY Family, Pals and my fabulous "castle". I just love spending time with my friends and family in my hometown :)

It's purple I adore now :D So let's color my post this time in total PURPLE! Awesome :D

Talk about my two months holiday in Medan. I have been spending most of the time with my family. Weekends with friends. Sadly, they are not free anymore as they will be facing their Mid Year Assessment in a few days time. Best of luck, guys! Study hard :D

WHOA, Today my post is totally Purple in colour! Totally Love it :D

Sigh, I still have to complete my Secondary School,

in order to enter the Polytechnic or Junior College I want to enter. I am considering Ngee Ann Polytechnic for Science Course or Catholic Junior College, which I think it is quite hard to enter. :( Sigh.... A single digit for O levels, some more, Junior College life is very stressful, I am going to hang myself! :/

Sometimes, I find myself stupid to study overboard at this age. If I could hang on a little while more in Medan til I graduate, then I decide to choose which country I would like to further my studies at. It might be much better. Anyways, to feel regret now is useless. Whatever has done, It has done. No point complaining, though... What I have to do right now is to enjoy my Secondary life in Singapore with no remorse. Enjoy whatever things I have... Sometimes, I might prefer my life in my hometown more than anything else. I miss my old self. A relaxed-self of me, spending the rest of my life slacking on a couch, eating snacks, watching my favorite TV shows. That is how I am suppose to enjoy my life. My teenage life.

Now, my life is totally different.

Sitting on my messy desk, A stock of books on the desk that you have to work on it, do something in it and finish the stuff that have to be done as soon as you see the book. It is horrible, studying over broad.

The life over broad is only about ONE THING : STUDY.

The place you can go on the weekends is only one place, LIBRARY. Pick some books and gain knowledge. Sometimes, I would love to see movies and hang out with my girls to chill. It is kind of difficult from next year on wards, There is a National Examinations that we have to face at the end of the year. Damn it, I still have not touch my N level Art Project. I am going to be a dead meet. I guess. I promise, I will start working on it when I am back in January next year :D *laughing nervously*

I still have long way to go until the day I QUIT Secondary School. Sigh, and I swear to God, I will try my very best and I HAVE TO MAKE IT to O Levels. It is one of the most important thing in my life to approach my Science dream :)

It may be a very long way to success, but I am working hard towards my dream. Science is my dream. Being someone who is useful, who is an expert in Chemistry, Yes, That is my dream. I have finally found my dream. Fashion Design was once my dream, but I think I could make a better choice by choosing to take Science course in the future. And, I promise you, Mom and Dad, and the rest of my family members as well as my great Pals. I will never disappoint you and let you guys down. I would never be like some of the people who will only count on parents feeding them some money without trying to 'make' own money. I am not those kind and FYI, I am definitely not in that kind of category.

"Working hard will lead to a bright future."

So, people, set a goal. A goal for your future. Plan it, Do it, Work for it! I would love to see many successful people in the world. The world will be so much beautiful :)

Fight for your dream, Be succeed in the future!

PS. I watched Playful kiss and I am done with it :), Now, I am watching Sungkyunkwan Scandal! :) Micky Yoo Chun! 사랑해!!!ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ! ^0^

xx, with loves.

2010-11-28T17:00:00.009+08:00

It is raining heavily.... So am I.....

"Absence diminishes mediocre passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans fires." - Francois de La Rochefoucauld.

I suffered from love disease for the second time. The very first time I tried to love someone, Someone doesn't return a love to me... Thus, neglecting me. I guess, my post this time will be a little sad and sorrow.

Relationship between Boys and Girls, maybe it is about Love and Hate.

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity.

Sometimes, I wonder, Why would people fall in love? What is the consequences If we fall in love to a wrong person? How life of one party or perhaps two parties would changed drastically?

Love can be a disaster, can be a miracle and can be a best thing or worst thing that ever happened. Love can also ruin your life and your heart totally. Love is unpredictable.

Ever since, I felt LOVE once again.... My life turned more lively. More meaningful, and more colourful. Everyone wants their Love relationship to be successful. That doesn't end with sorrow and tears. It is impossible to think that way. All love shifts and changes. I do not know if you can be wholeheartedly in love at all times. It is almost impossible. I almost believe, No men is faithful. They approached you when there is something sweet and attractive in you. Just like a candy. When you tasted all the sweet away, There is no more taste left.... It is BITTER.

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." - Lao Tzu

I believe, Relationship is just like a candy. It is always sweet when you are first in a relationship, It turns bitter after a few months...or maybe weeks....

I was in love with a guy, two years ago....

A love, that you know, it is impossible to be true.....

I fell in love with a guy who doesn't love me back anymore, who was once in love with me but, Not anymore.... It is as hurtful as someone stab a knife right into your heart...

A remorse you will never change for a life time....

A reminiscence of the sweet-bitter love that could change one's life....

When finally, I am able to fall in love with someone else....

There's a hope....

Hoping, It will be perfectly beautiful.

It was beautiful... But who can ever stand, a relationship which is full of remorse, regret, recklessness and pain?

Now, I am too afraid to fall in love anymore....

I don't know how long will i be phobia-tic to Love.

But rightnow, I am too afraid to fall for anyone......

Anyway, for those who reads this blog and even thinks that probably I am referring to whom. I am sorry, This post is for everyone. Because, Most of the girls, think this way too.... too afraid to be in a relationship anymore....

Xoxo.

2010-11-27T21:35:00.003+08:00

I had a suckish two weeks disaster.

Yeah, exactly. I was suppose to enjoy my holiday in my hometown. Things are getting worse and worse when time goes by. Well, that's not the point. The main point is, I watched many Korean Dramas! :D Done with Prosecutor Princess, I watched Personal Taste and now, I am on the way to an end of Playful Kiss. Amazing Shows!

Sigh...

Hoping my days will be better.....

I was suppose to enjoy my two months holiday in my hometown......

2010-11-26T17:56:00.001+08:00

Title : Let me hear your voice - Big Bang

The rain just now has stopped

The smell of asphalt is floating around the city

Hey, over there too, the weather is fine already right?

For the weather has cleared up from the west

Since youre not a morning person

Everyday, will you be able to wake up properly?

Im still worried about things like that

The spreading sky, the freedom

Although neither of them has changed

Right now, just that its only just that you are not by my side

Let me hear your voice

If we become honest, surely

Well be able to understand each other

Please open your heart

Let me hear your voice

The path we have come is, for us, definitely

An important STEP to that future

The first time I met you was

Around this season right?

The light up street was

Glowing beautifully

The crybaby-you, from that time on, often

Laid your forehead on my shoulder

You were crying right? That extreme warmth

From your touch on my shoulder

Everyone lives, carrying his own worry

Desperately holding his broken heart

Let me hear you voice

If we become more kind

Well be able to love each other

Dont turn away from my eyes

Let me hear your voice

Lets get over those entwined anxieties and loneliness

The feelings of this moment become our bond

Yeah, Since you went away hasnt been the same

In my heart all I got is pain

Could it be that I played a game to lose you, I cant maintain

Sunlight moonlight you lit my life realize in the night

while love shines bright

Cant let you go were meant forever baby let me know

This past without you, Cant forget you

Letting me be the cloud hanging above me

Raining on me missing you touch

Nights get long and its hard to clutch

Were apart breaks my heart

Its all for the best girl youre my world

In time my love unfurls

He will then wait for you girl

Let me hear your voice

If we become honest, surely

Well be able to understand each other

Please open your heart

Let me hear your voice

The path we have come is, for us, surely

An important STEP to that future

2010-11-08T16:27:00.004+08:00

Today is the 2nd day in Medan, Nothing special has happen recently. Life has been normal. It is my own house, anyway. and I love to be in my own house :) So much better than one in Singapore. But somehow, I miss Singapore, I miss Vivocity, I miss Marina Square, I miss Plaza Sing, I miss Parkway, I miss Toa Payoh. LOL! :D Everything there is great, and I realise, Singapore is my second home. I miss someone over there as well as my buddies! 2 months is a long period of time. Hence, I am spending my miraculous holiday with my family and friends here, That should be fine! I love spending time with my friends and family here as well. They are as great as ever. Another thing happened is, my beloved 2 years Macbook has finally officially spoiled. Bravo! Which means, I am going to get a new Macbook Pro soon :)

Seriously, I don't know what else to write....

Shall stop here, and see you guys next post! :D

Someone over there,

Hey, I hope you are doing great there without me by your side! HAHAHA! :D I miss you, really. I didn't lie about this. Anything, just text me. I will reply :) See you two months later!

2010-11-06T00:16:00.007+08:00

A few more hours left to my departure to Medan! I will be leaving this country for approximately two months. I am extremely sure I will be missing this country. People here will be waiting for my comeback in January. I have been planning of a lot of class outing with my former classmates. After all, they are the greatest. Well, I bought plenty of Korean Dramas, so I could enjoy the love of Korean Romantic Stories in my hometown when I have nothing to be done at home. Yeah, and I am totally looking forward to my outing to South Korea at the end of this year to next year. A week vacation to Korea shall bring me lots of memories and fun! This two-month-holiday has to bring me a lot of memories. I hope, things will be great! Holiday homework are in the luggage and they are following me home to Indonesia. I hate it, but I have to finish them and to practice more work in order to achieve 15 for N level. Although, 15 is not a really great result but It is better than nothing. I will aim for 10 for my O level and I will strive to death for it. Biomedical Science course in Ngee Ann Polytechnic is waiting for me. And next target is, I have to get in to the NTU, the Nanyang Technology University. I promise myself I will do my very best to get into there. All I have to do now is to study really hard for my weak subjects (i.e. Chinese, Maths). I have to admit that I improved a lot on my Chinese Language this time. At least, It was from F9 to C5 :) What a great job! :D

Another thing is, Sometimes, It seems like, even my Trusted Friends, don't trust me as much as I do. Things like this always happen on me.... I think, I deserve to be treated this way, though..

See you guys next post and I shall post more stories about events happened in Indo during my two month holiday~ :D

2010-10-28T23:02:00.003+08:00

I've been Promoted to Sec 4.

I could not be any happier, Thank GOD for answering my prayer. Like I'd promised, I will work twice harder and buck up for my forthcoming N level and O level. L1/R4 15 for N level, L1/R4 10 for O level! Biomedical Science, Shall be waiting for me! :D

2010-10-26T12:37:00.012+08:00

Finally updated my blog after so long. Well, Life's been great. I had finished my End Of Year Examination, which really made my life miserable for the past few weeks. Anyway, It is over now, and i am in the holiday mood! Currently, I am interested in learning Science! I bought Pure Chemistry text book and it work book, and I have been learning Pure Chemistry these few days. :) I can't wait till November! :D I am going back really soon! :D

Last week, on 16th October 2010, I went to Airport to take a glance at JYJ (Jejung, Yoochun, Junsu) , my dream had came to reality! I saw Jaejoong! I said HI to JYJ and I had their response! I am dead happy and my life sparkles since the day I saw Jaejoong! :D

I went to their Showcase as well. Although the seat sucks! but, seeing them live is most likely a DREAM-COME-TRUE. :D And Last Saturday, on 23rd October, I went to Expo again, to attend a KPOP Night Concert. There are 7 korean bands! :D BIG BANG, FT. Island, SHINee, ZE:A, The Boss, Infinite, Girls Generation :D They are awesome. Especially BIG BANG and SHINEE! Two thumbs up! I will never forget the moment! :D

The next thing I would like to share is, My Life Abroad.

It has been a year and 4 months in Singapore, a foreign country for me. I used to dream of studying overseas. Now, I know, how tough life could be. You have to settle every single thing on your own. And you have no one to count on, yeah, and you are staying at someone else's home. A stranger's home with a bunch of strangers in the unit you are staying at. Hence, we seldom communicate with each other. Well, It might sound simple for all of you who have none of these experience. I would say, life overseas ALL ON YOUR OWN is not as easy as most of you people think. Next thing you might be wondering is, School. Yes. School is fun! Where you learn new things, a different environment to study, meeting new people, talk to different types of people from different parts of the world. I get to know friends from many different countries and cities. Some are from Thailand, Vietnam, Cambodia, China, Taiwan, Singapore as well as Indonesia. I concluded It is rare to meet people from the same city or hometown. The only to communicate with the foreigners is to speak English or Chinese. Unfortunately, I have been speaking Singlish ever since I get into the Government school in Singapore. People around you will be speaking Singlish too. Well, It is Singapore's lifestyle! Who cares? But, slowly, I started to realize that If I continue to be influenced like this, I would not improve in my life. No offense though. At least now I know, how to differentiate 'real' English and Singlish. I know a lot of people in Singapore, but rarely find those true friends I seek for. The ones I am close with now is my Family, and some friends in Indonesia. Sometimes, I hope to go back to Indonesia to have my normal life back. Sometimes, I hated my life here! Full of obstacles, challenges and torture! I might sound as I am exaggerating it, but It is true! Let's Imagine, when you are having a very important exams, there is something else come up and you have no ONE to help you! With no alternate choice, you have to settle it by your own. And when you get stressed up, no one could be there for you. Yep, I do talk to my Mom and Dad on phone but it doesn't really help much. Sometime, I wished I had never chose to study oversea. Sometime, I wished I could turn back time. To be more silly, Sometimes I wish I own a Time Machine!

Well, No point complaining. No matter what, It will never be fixed.

Secondly, I met quite a number of people who could be really affect much in life. I treated them as friends although I know they don't deserve to be treated that way. They can be really hypocritical and they can be the best betrayer in life. Chances were always given to them yet, they wasted it plenty of times and I do not want to even 'see' them as my friends anymore. Really, they are much more 'magical' type of people I met and You will never expect how 'cunning' they are. Yeah, I do not want to talk about this as I do not want people who read this to feel offended, I don't know. Some betrayer-friends are truly intolerable and unforgivable.

Currently, I am concentrating on Science, to fulfill my alternative dream, as an expert in Chemistry! I have been planning to take Biomedical Science course in the future and I am working hard towards it. :D

That's enough for today's post. It has been a really long post for today.

See you guys next post! Thank you, readers, for reading my post :D

2010-07-04T23:49:00.002+08:00

My Awesome One-Month-June Holiday.

They brought me joy, laughter and happiness. Having a one month vacation in my own hometown is still the best vacation. Many pictures were taken. I missed my pals in Medan :) They are obviously, Joselyn, Bryana, Natalia, Veronica, Erlisna, Elizabeth, Fransiska. :) The one month holiday makes me enjoy tons of fun with my greatest family and friends :D

Charlie :)

2010-05-19T17:01:00.003+08:00

It has been ages since I last blogged. Greetings to the people who read my blog, I appreciate it. Apparently, This is the sixth month being a student in Guang Yang Secondary School, and It was the eleventh month in Singapore. I realized, this blog skin has been ages since I last edited it. Sickening, though. I decided to change my blog skin, perhaps. Recently, I went out with a classmate of mine, Michelle. to AMK hub and watched "The Last Song" starring Miley Cyrus. Before-math, I thought the movie isn't as interesting as I thought, But It shoot up beyond my expectation. The movie took away my tears. Nicholas Sparks wrote awesome stories, and I admire him. Today, Is a definitely a terrible day for me. My Mid Year Examination results aren't satisfying enough for me, as all I did was aiming high!

But, one thing is,

"Failure is the Mother of Success"

It is a lesson in order to be better. Besides, I am sure people fail before succeed, even the famous ones. I am so not gonna give up! with the support of family, and friends. I am so not gonna give up to achieve my dreams. This is a promise to myself.

I am missing my hometown badly, I miss the food there, I miss my home, I miss my family and friends. Memories won't fade. :)

See You guys next post!

2009-12-04T13:16:00.002+08:00

Today is 4th December 2009.

ALIVE. Yes, I am still alive, people. But then the result is not satisfying enough. I am posted to Guang Yang Secondary School and a normal stream. Which is so pathetic. Although I heard Guang Yang is till a better school than other normal neighbourhood school, But Still, I am disappointed to myself. How could I? I felt so hopeless. I wish I could have done better in my AEIS exam. Never mind, Better than nothing. At least I got a school. :)

2009-11-29T17:16:00.008+08:00

'3B'

OUR MEMORABLE GRADUATION CEREMONY & FAREWELL

on 20th December 2009.

This event was held last Friday at Hotel Royal , Newton. Different countries, races and cities united us all. We faced many obstacles together. We faced many problems as a class. 3B. Recalling our first meeting on 28th June 2009 caused teardrops on our cheeks. It was incredible to unite us all and yet, there's still a farewell for all of us. Even though we can still meet each other in Singapore but still, we can't meet each other often as we probably will go to the different schools. and we can't be a CLASS anymore. I love the jokes in my class. the troublemakers. the jokers and our teachers. I never feel this happy before. I love my class, my 3B, my classmates and friends. They are a bunch of awesome fellas. We caused problems in class, However we still have this friendship power inside us.

We ended our Farewell party at around 2 plus and decided to go for a very last outing to Vivo City to take some memorable pictures as a class. Before we leave, we hand up our so-called "year book" and let our class crave an autograph on it. :) LOVE 3B!

NARCISSISTIC

See you again, 3B.

See you next year in our own Secondary School! :)

Will miss you all a lot! :)

Love 3B For ever :D

2009-11-23T14:15:00.004+08:00

4th December 2009 , Friday.

DEAD OR ALIVE.

This day decides.

What I have to do now is to wait, Keep waiting and waiting. The result of my DHS placement test disappointed me a lot. I tried to keep calm and stop myself of being pessimistic. When I received the email of the DHS staff telling me, my test result doesn't meet their requirement, I felt that I lost half of myself. The other half was dead a few minutes ago. I thought I had tried very best to fight for this test? Overall, Never mind.

As I am awaiting for my Admission Exercise for International Students result to come out on 4th December 2009, which is on Friday. I tell myself. "I better don't fail. Otherwise, I am a nobody.", Now I am dying. Hoping I could pass the test and I MUST! No Matter What !

2009-10-24T23:05:00.003+08:00

Love Does Separate Us (L'Amour Nous Sépare)

Through all time, love has strung beautiful art,

Does love now weave this vision in my heart?

Have two stars been taken straight from the sky,

Do they look back at me as I look into your eyes?

Love does separate us in lands so far,

Love does make this a trial so hard.

May I ask for one night to shrink this land,

May I have you just one night, just to reach your hand?

If my wish I may have not, let us kiss with our minds,

Let our words carry us together on winds of divine.

Love does separate us in lands far away,

But if love does ring true, I'll get to you some way.

Oh no, people. I'm not dead yet. I had been so busy these few months and been MIA-ed for about 2 months ? Idk. As what everybody arnd me knows. I had been missing my hometown like hell. Feel like going back home, I miss my room which is full of my dbsk posters. I miss my lovely and comfy bed. I miss my lousy computer although I have my macbook with me now. :) Well, Its fun in singapore. I have awesome friends from different countries and cities. I am close with my two surabayanese friends recently or perhaps, since I know them from the first day of school? :) And hey, I had just realized that my blog skin has been so last last last year ! so old liao eeyer. need to change it to some new skin i guess ? yea i should. I'm bored my self either.

So, last saturday, I went out with my 2 surabayanese friends, 1 palembang friend, 2 jakartanese friends, 1 thai friend and 1 makassar friend to Vivo city and saw a movie named 500 days of summers. Honestly, I despise the whole story. It was like no link? Idk myself too. Lol, here's another pictures we took with Aldo's camera.

Well? What can I say nerhs? We've been sleeping in the Kopitiam. We were damn tired after the G-Max thingy in Clarke Quay ! :)

G-Max, Omfg! I love it like siao after trying it. Bungy Jumping! So fun siol! :)

And FYI, i've been so free nowadays because our AEIS aka Admission Exercise for International Students examination had finally over! which means we have our F-R-E-E-D-O-M! Yay! We play as many times as we like :) and today is very fun too for goodness sake ! :) My 2 surabayanese friends and I travelled around Sg, we headed to Queenstown this afternoon at around 2 pm? hm, we took the bus 195 and just sit down there and look outside the window. We passed so many places we don't know and end up passing Clarke Quay. and thrilled when we saw G-Max thingy! Walao! SO FUN SIOL! *ahem* , HAHAHAHA ! :D In the end, we passed Esplanade City Hall and ended up at Marina Square which is the last stop. We alighted and walk to the Marina Square, Suntec City and Raffles City. Kao, so fun sia! never felt this happy before. *walao so kuazhang!* , then headed to Bugis afterwards. Shopped at Bugis Street. walked around. til my feet damn pain sia. Walao. Damn tiring de worhs. :D and homed afterwards. We actually planned to slacking at Star bucks but ended up going home. Nextweek, I plan to go Changi Airport there to slack with my peers by any chance. :) Lol, I think I adapted well in Singapore. My roommates are great , my schoolmates are awesome.

However, I still miss my hometown like siao de. Homesick liao. :(

PSPS, I love my iPhone alot siol! :D

2009-09-05T13:46:00.005+08:00

I'm bored bored bored. super uber B-O-R-E-D. ==" so i decided to upload some photos before I bored to death. Today I'm not going out anywhere as most of my indo friends have gone back home.=="

Han Yeon Ji loves Kim Jae Joong

and LASTLY, FUCKKKK!! I hate this fucking scene.

Jaejoong!! you mustn't hug HER!!!!!

2009-09-04T18:31:00.008+08:00

Yesterday, I went to Orchard to meet Veronica. my old pal from my hometown surely. We went to Somerset MRT station by walking. then headed to Chinatown, Vivo and Bugis. Then I brought her home to Eunos. :) Today, is our class outing day!! :D Love it tooo muchhh , It was too awesome ! :D Love Singapore, Love 3B, Love my Friends! zzzz :D

old pictures , on 21st August, JH's Birthday Celebration and BBQ at East Coast Park :) , So Fun , Peepo !! :D

Act cute Act cute :D

on 22nd August , Outing at Vivo City with my two surabaya friends :)

on 31st August, a day before teacher's day, our class decorated a giordano tee for teachers. and, there were Lauren and Vivian(me) decorated the tee, SO SERIOUS-LOOKING FACES! LOL :D

I'm so serious of decorating , i guess :D

Our principal received our gift (above), and she was amazed . so does our form teacher (below)

And, Lastly, Today! Our class outing was totally awesome. We played some games. :) Our BeLoved Chairman created the games. then Laurenthia, Chrisen, Michelle and I played roller blade. It was my stupid first time, (I admit), and I learned from Lauren of how to use it. ==" I was so blurred too. Haha, Then, we zilian-ing around. ride bike with YP!!! :) Hahaha, So FUN for heaven's sake. :) Here's some pic. There are still tons of it. I'm waiting for AYP to upload them all. (Am waiting~~~ waiting~~~waiting~~~)

In front of United Square , zilian-ing :)

Cisenn, Vivi-ME, Chel :D

More photos coming real soon. Anw, gd news for me!! :) My bro said tmr he's gg to buy the iPhone 3Gs for me! :DDDD Cant WAIT any longer.

[updated @ 21.25]

Here's another tons of pictures from the outing today X3, Thanks to AYP! :) and am waiting for Michelle for another bunch of photos she had took with her camera. :) Waiting~~ :D

Aldo and I Jumped the highest ! :) Love it

3B ! Saranghaeyo :)

They looked so serious looking at the comp :D

Aldo wondering around =="

What they doing ? =="

Omg , so dark . cant see our faces =="

Act cute =D

Aldo and Pattarapol :)

Yvonne and Vivian--ME

Wanyi and Agatha :D

Lauren and Cisenn

Enjoyed this game alot !! ><

All gathered @ McD before leaving, McFlurry! I have it 3 times! :) :)

YAAAAAY , 3B , ILYSM :)

2009-09-01T16:07:00.000+08:00

I HATE , 고아라 GOH AH RA !

OMFG, how could she and my dearest Jeong Yoon Ho KKKKKIIIIISSSSSSEEEEDDDDD ?

I'm so pissed off! Enough of Jaejoong and Han Hyo Joo's kissing scene already. NOW? Jeong Yoon Ho! =(

2009-08-31T18:24:00.003+08:00

Hello , fellas , it's been a while since i last posted ! :) I've missed my home country so far and am going back for a week time. Next week, which was my Birthday and also the day I fly back to Medan, excited me utterly! Can't wait to meet my pals , family and many more plans I've planned days before. Sure It will be tons of fun and More over, I got so many truck loads things to tell my pals. Exchange experiences for sure :) , So, last saturday I went to Novena with 仇亿, my new chinese friend from 杭州. We walked around Velocity and Novena Square. Then, we headed to AMK Hub for an hour before we headed to Bugis to catch up movie. We're planning to watch Final Destination which we're not allowed to watch cos it was NC18 movie. We watched "The Proposal" instead. I Love RYAN REYNOLDS! :) He's a sexy piece of man. and Yesterday, I went out again to Orchard with my roommates. walked around ION, Taka, Far east and watched "Scandal Maker" this korean movie. Love it Love it! 2 thumbs up! :) So, comedically~ :)

Teachers' Day is tomorrow but our school celebrated it earlier, We bought flowers and a plain giordano tee for each teacher. We signed on the tee before we gave it to the teachers. I wrote plenty of korean words on it which was enjoyable! Hahaha. :) Pictures will be up pretty soon. (well, as soon as our chairman AYP upload it in FB and I upload it here afterwards).

Tomorrow is HOLIDAY! and i'll be going out with my two surabaya friends to Bugis Street and Orchard again! Can't wait! I'm getting excited :) LOVE MY LIFE HERE though i miss my friends a lot in my hometown, how're they been doing so far? :D

2009-08-22T00:28:00.001+08:00

Just homed from east coast after a barbeque event, It's Jessica's Birthday today. and we celebrated at East Coast. Man, know many new friends. :) Most are indonesians for sure :D They're quite friendly. and some of the guys are kindaaa cute and funny! (though kinda annoying!), love today! and i envy Jessica. her bf gave her an iPod Touch! and gave her many surprises. We ended up splashing water on each other! FUN!

2009-08-19T18:43:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YENNY LIMANTO 이얜니 :)

This is my very special Bday Present for you :)

Hey, when will we going crazy tgthr again? IMY much! :D

Ever since I study in Sg, we seemed to be quite far. Hahaha :D

I miss the time :D

Hey , anyway, by any chance. I learnt Javanese ! :D

aku iso ngomong jowo yoo :DDDD

ANW, enjoy yr birthday and, rmb to invite me to yr bday party also

2009-08-09T13:45:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was another F.U.N day. In the afternoon, I met my brother and his gf at Somerset and we walked along together at Orchard Central. did some window-shopping. Omg, miss my bro so much alrd. We nagged at each other, teased and bullied. I bullied him by telling him how old he was rightnow. His look was like "Ajussi" already. :D Then all we did were just walking around all the Malls in the Orchard there. Soon, I remembered that one of my crazy roommate was alone at vivo, decided going sentosa. How crazy is she? Hahaha. She was quite depressed I guess? So, I just went to vivo to meet her. My other roommate also shown up with her boyfriend, the Thai. :) We gossiped, played. But J seemed dying last night. She got some problems, but were resolved! Then we went to Sentosa, although it was already 8pm! Whoa. :D Played Luge, Walked around took tons loads of pictures (will be uploaded soon!)

2009-08-07T19:21:00.008+08:00

Feel like laughing and crying at the same time now. Sigh, all the sweet talks are super fake in my ears. Sweet talks are lies. Stop being flirtatious, can't he? Last few weeks, kept attached himself just like that. Today, started flirting with another girl. What a pervert! I'd never think of he'll be so pathetic. so desperate that he doesn't have any gf and anyhow pick one. And how dare he commented on my english? Bet that, His english is no better than mine. Not that I'm boasting or sth. but that's the truth. So, why don't he just shut his effing mouth up?

Gosh, he is so pathetic. I was gossiping with my friend in class just now. about some other people. Then he thought we're teasing him by whispering. Will there be anything funnier? He's such a LOSER in my eyes.

Kept commenting on other boys about how ugly they are. how short they are. how sissy they are. without even wanted to look at himself first in the mirror before judging other innocence.

2009-08-06T00:00:00.002+08:00

Mr Benny Lim's Birthday Bash!

(credit : AYP)

The United 3B :)

Nvm , Let's see what's is it inside the wrapper.

See?

Birthday Boy, Mr Benny :D

What a nicely designed Birthday cake :D

The Chairman and Mr Benny :D, woots! XD (there was me behind, awkward!)

What are those hands doing?

Our Chairman, Ow How cute! XD

Kyeobda! :D

Aiyah, my eyes closed leh. OMG! Awkward!

Act cool what!

"Stop running at the corridor!"

Here I was, in blue jacket. Wah. narcissistic ! :D

What is he looking at? Wondering~~~

Ah~ No wonder lah, there were 2 narcissistic girls who pose behind there what. XD

Ms Kong teaching the chinese girls some maths :D

OMG! We both are such narcissistic creatures on earth! XD

2009-08-05T17:37:00.002+08:00

Aldo, Laurenthia and I kept rushing to buy the birthday cake for our former teacher, Mr Benny. It's his birthday today. Well, Aldo was such a busy body today. Never stop moving. LOL :) But bet that, he's very cute. Haha. Omg, then we all prepared the birthday stuff, cakes and all those presents and bday card. We turned off the light and forced Mr Benny to get in to our class though it supposed to be our math period now. :D Played cake around, made it messy! :)

Photos are up very soon :) Along with the excursion pictures will be uploaded soon! My days in Singapore are pretty exciting. Love it so much! But still, I felt kinda homesick again some of the time. Miss my hometown. Anyhoo, my upcoming birthday will be damn great as I'm back to Medan alrdy! Yoohoo! :D Shh, keep that a secret, dude! I won't let my friends know. LOL. Nah, they knew it already. :DDD

(Photos Uploaded soon!) - I'm waiting for Jose and Aldo to upload those photos fr me and tag me on FB so i could copy and paste it here in my blog. :)

And, luckily, here's some of the class excursion pictures taken last week @ singapore flyer, City Hall. It was so FUN! no doubt. :)

Aldo Yosa Putra. :)

A Bunch of Narcist Girls. 5 Indo Girls and 2 Chinese :)

Lastly, never forgot about this event. MW's Birthday. on the 27th June 2009. Which was also my last day in Medan before leaving to Singapore :)

Miss them, Junior High 3 Nelson Mandela :)

Ok, Done :)

Will upload the Bday pictures soon! :DD

Anw, I hate this flirtatious and pervert guy. OMG! Loves to flirt with EVERY girls. DAMN!

2009-08-02T01:13:00.001+08:00

Just finished celebrated Jessica's BF's Birthday Party. All my face became so sticky all over. and I re-bathe again. :) Lol. Know many good-looking Thai guys just now :) LOL.

2009-08-01T22:41:00.002+08:00

Went out to Kembangan, visited Yvonne's villa, we watched KO ONE then watched KO3Guo. Laughed then I gone sleepy. Directly headed to MRT station cos we're going to Bugis to catch up movies! :) Some stupid incidents happened in the MRT station. I was damn pale alright! It takes half our to solve that stupidity. Went to Bugis and we watched The HangOver. damn it was sooooo funny! :D Love it. kept laughing non stop! :D Love it Love it! I was too fatigue now. Lmaos. Tonight gg to be great toos! celebrate someone's birthday! :D

PS.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY IN ADVANCE. ERLISNA CHOW!

though im not there with you. but no worries, my heart is still for you, pal. :)

2009-07-30T18:41:00.005+08:00

操操操！他竟然没给我点面子呢！靠！卑鄙无耻下流肮脏恶心讨厌幼稚鬼！要分就分啊！怕你屁股啦！靠！我真的受不了男生了，每个男生都一样的！我不会相信任何男生了！只会看自己怎么表现了！男生有什么了不起啊？哎，我怎么会为了一个又长的不帅又讨人厌的个臭男生哭呀？我眼睛是不是有点问题了！我不该哭的！很要面子的臭娘子！放屁啊他！丑八怪！

Its awkward to post something here. yes, 我失恋了. Then its my very first time and hope it will be the very last time for me to cry for him. YKW? Boys always pretend they got nth to do in a relation ship. All they think is very important to their 'LIFE' is totally their face. they never give us girls some faces either. not even ONCE. Haven't you guys notice yet? When you and your bf quarrel or argue or something doleful. Its US girls who take the first move to speak or talk to the guy. It always US who apologized first. Haha, I find that really funny. They dont act like a GENTLE MAN? Sigh, pity some stupid boys.

Hence, not all boys are so shitty like some of them. Maybe its around 40% of the caring boys who think "faces aren't that important" in this world. I hope I would get one of those guys? :)

Nvm, I won't even want to cry for a GUY anymore.

Yeaaa, 남자?죽어!!!

Ps, today we went for a trip for our class excursions :) Love it though I find that GUY was sooooo super irritating.

2009-07-19T20:32:00.000+08:00

Such an exhausting trip :)

I went to Bugis , then headed to AMK Hub , I bought a flat thenn gg Bishan . bought alot at Comics Connection :) Kim Jae Joong my hottie . my life . my sexy angel :DD LOL . Then at last gg to Vivo city :DDD

Love todayyyy :DDD

2009-07-13T23:59:00.002+08:00

today i was so pissed off by my parents. they made me feel down. akhhh, they just nvr understand their kid, i guess ? I feel like dont wanna go home to my hometown anymore as I have many good folks here :D

2009-07-12T18:52:00.002+08:00

Another Wonderful Sunday (:

I spent my whole afternoon with my Chinese friend, Yvonne. Yes, only the both of us. We met up at Bugis MRT then headed to Bugis Junction. I bought a Bossini tee which was similar to D's and Y's. :D. then we did a window-shopping until Yvonne stopped at a shop. She bought a trouser then we went to Orchard, Kinokuniyo. searching for some books and magazines and we went home :D

2009-07-11T22:33:00.012+08:00

04/07/09

05/07/09

11/07/09

2009-07-11T22:24:00.005+08:00

Today was sort of F-U-N ! (:

I have my Chinese tuition at 11.15 then it ended at 12.15. I headed to Toa Payoh Central to meet my bro (miss him!) and take my things which was sent by my parents from Medan for sure. hahs (: Then, Diana, Bryan and I headed to TPC again for MRT. they're going to Bugis for some thing(?) while I alighted at Dhoby Ghaut and went to Chinatown. Meet Yvonne , Malvin and a medanese guy too. His name is Kenny. We had our lunch at People's Park Centre. hmmm, food court lahs. Kimchi fried rice. :D then approached Orchard. Yvonne and I bought the same Giordano Cheer You Up tee. couple-shirt? Haha . then went to the cinema. Aldo arrived.

Actually, some doleful incident happened in the cinema. which was unspeakable one. Well, forget about it. XD. I see 'improvements' on M and Y's relationship. Woooohoo :P I sat beside Aldo. Yvonne sat beside me and Malvin was beside her. We watched The Haunted -something something- I forgot. Haha. It wasssss soooo fuckingly creepy! Damn, Aldo screamed alot. LOL. Then I went home ALONE. sobs. how pity?

Pictures are in the next post ~ :D

PS, Last night, I talked to a Korean guy ON PHONE ! (: I was so nervous that i couldn't speak out a word properly. too nervous mah.

2009-07-09T21:53:00.002+08:00

iPhone, I'll buy it very soon. I guess, iPhone 3Gs was released today? 9/7. wasn't it? Im not sure either. So this Saturday. I will be going to Bishan to own the exclusive posters and ez link stickers! Anw, It was really funny. I mistaken them coming to sg. LOL! It was so silly , man! (: *coughs*, and *grins*. Alright then, currently watching Absolute Boyfriend. and I WANT THE ROBOT! Omfg, Tenjo Night! Aishiteruyo~ Nani sore???? :DDD Whatev. (:

It's been ages since I watch DBSK's newest MV. I kind of missing Jae Joong. that baby of mine should be doing pretty well for their life tour concerts (: XD

Ps, I miss my Omma, Appa, Dongsaeng, Chingu~ (:

2009-07-05T22:03:00.002+08:00

It's Sunday, people ! (: I've just homed from hanging out with my two room mates. We went to Plaza Singapura and shopped a lot. Almost broke, no doubt! XD I kinda miss my friends and family too, Sigh Sigh Sigh ~ I bought "Absolute Boyfriend" DVD. I think there's a big sale around Singapore? Idk. I bought it for 23.90 only. Cheap isn't it? Well~ *coughs* I wanna buy the Absolute Boyfriend SP, but I think I'm not gonna watch it anymore since It was sooooooooo. UGH! Irritating! I hate the ending. I watched it last night and this morning. OMG love it cans! (: How I wish to own a gorgeous manly robot! (?!) *coughs again*

Anyhoo, we ate sushi at sakae sushi outside Plaza Sing. kinda over-order. eat til our tummy became big enough for people mistaken us. I mean, they thought we were pregnant? Idk. Lol :D Pictures upload soon! (: So, Its been a day since my Family went back home to Medan. But I enjoyed here. Really. Some more, Jim bro came back to sg alrd. :D

Well, wish me luck for everything I do alrights, peepo ! (:

Misses you guys and Kim Jae Joong!!! XD

2009-07-05T01:01:00.000+08:00

Mr Benny's Birthday Bash Pictures (credit : AYP)

The United 3B :)

Let's see what's inside the wrapper.

Yay! See?

The very nice birthday cake :D

Birthday Boy, Mr Benny :)

The Chairman and Our Homeroom, woots! XD (there's me behind there)

Chairman, Aldo Yepe :)

Kyeobda! :D

Miss Kong teaching the Chinese girls :D

These guys acted funny! :D

OMG! So narcissistic the both of us. XD

Chairman, again! :D

2009-07-04T21:02:00.002+08:00

I just homed from a exhausting trip. Not really actually. IT'S FUN! (: I slept over at Mom's place last night. talked and gossiped the whole night. Today, we went to Orchard tgt. FUN! (: Then brought em to airport, eat then leave liao. So sad orhs. They're leaving to Medan liaos. Maybe arrived there liao bahs. and Im having my Math tuition tmr morning at 10.30. DAMN!

2009-06-28T20:59:00.002+08:00

Ok, Should adapt to this place real soon.

Im now in Singapore, guess what? though my parents and siblings were with me a few minutes ago. but I miss em hella much alrd. and Imagine? Im gg to stay here for the next 3 years? come one. =X Ok, btw, its my choice. and i could stand it for my own decision, teeheee.

So, tmro. I'll start the preparation thingy. Wish me luck. PEOPLE!! XD

Ps, will less online. from Monday to Thursday NO LAPTOPS ARE ALLOWED! Friday til Sunday, Laptops are alloweddddd XD so, I will really less online luhs .

2009-06-26T01:31:00.011+08:00

JanDi 잔디 and JiHoo 지후

I just loved to watch it over and over again. Boys Before Flowers or known as "Kkotboda Namja" or 花样男子 or 꽃보다 남자 . (: Lee Min Ho and Kim Hyeon Joong are awesome actors. I hope to see more of those photos of JanDi and JiHoo. First, I was like, Omo! they're perfect with each other, don't they? lol.

이민호/구준표 Lee Min Ho/Goo Joon Pyo

Oh, my hottie prince. Omg. he is such a hottie. xD anyhoo, i've been admiring many hot guys i know that. these few days. I fell for GDragon and TOP. after watching the BBF Parody of theirs. and Coffee Prince Parody.

Awww, so cuteee. GD 권지용 and TOP 최승현 are awesome (: for VIPs, now I understood why you guys loved Big Bang. sure you loved them, Why Not? they're veryyyyyy awesome. (: esp the two above. Love em! xDD Yeyeyeye~

Woots! XD SiWon and Sungmin...

Super Junior is sooooo . esp Kim Hee Cheol, Lee Teuk, Kang In, Eun Hyuk, Sung Min. *OMO* superb funny, cheerful, happy, and AWKWARD! Lol. I watched the Gee performance by Heecheol, Kangin, Eunhyuk, and Sungmin. and yeah xD Hee Cheol knows the dance pretty well. the others just imitate him. xD well, nothing weird, he sure knows 'everything' ? Hahah. I laughed and rolled on floor. (Ok, I kinda exaggerate it.)

So, this is the "Four Seasons" which never happen.

(left to right : Yunho (DBSK), Kangin (SUJU), Jaejoong (MY BOY!), Heecheol (SUJU))

This group almost happen if Jae and Ho didn't join DBSK. eventually~

I think, DBSK is a good combination ~ hmmmm, wondering .... DBSK this sexy gods of the east~ is too perfect tgthr. A Damn Hottie , Kim Jae Joong ; Awesome Dolphin , Kim Jun Su ; Cute Mature Little Boy , Shim Chang Min ; 2U Rapper (?) Jeong Yoon Ho and Park Yoo Cheon . See? and Super Junior ? They're soooooo cheerful all time and some of them are gorgeous clowns. Lols. xD

Blerhhhh :P , Photo Booth effect is quite good, isn't it ? xD

2009-06-20T20:20:00.003+08:00

Eventually, I graduated.

I didn't go to school to take the progress report due to I have to join my Intensive class this afternoon. So, unfortunately, didn't go. My Dad went to take the report. and yes, graduated. not so excited actually, because I'd already knew I'll passed the exams. Lols. I won't fail! (: But then, I got some unspeakable problems, I'm so frustrated.

Love this JaeSu pict. (:

I was like dying to buy this Giordano "Cheer You Up" tee. :DD should have it soon!!! :D Must have the white one, so Jae and I wear the similar tees. yay! :D hopefully, when I reach sg. I'll definitely snatch for it! promise :)

Currently loving Sad Sonata's soundtracks! so touching~

2009-06-20T00:45:00.003+08:00

8 Days Left til the day I left...

Omona, I'm so excited... How is it like to live alone abroad. But, I'll be homesick everyday. :X So, this two weeks intensive was pretty great. It will end on the 27th while I left on the 28th.

Last night , I was busying saving the photos of my dearie Kim Jae Joong into my Macbook. gah, gorgeous! (: Love it anw! Yeah, I dreamt of Kim Jae Joong again last night. Omg! (: Uhm, anw, I was like dying searching fr the Giordano tee Jae's been wearing. I must have it! Yay! couple shirt huh? :D but Han Hyo Joo had it for herself too. Dammit! :X

Again, I got problems in downloading songs and videos. Oh, come on! Macbook is going wrong~ Gah. Hate you -just for today, i promise-. Ok, I watched Boys Before Flowers and fell for Lee Min Ho again (: He's funnily gorgeous. Man, Love him!

Kim Hyun Joong and Kim Beom toos ! Love them alot!

ps, finished watching Cinderella Man. Kwon Sang Woo! I'll really miss him! Hohoho.

"대박"

2009-06-13T23:31:00.004+08:00

Farewell Party & Graduation.

I wasted liters of tears last night, caused by Sad Sonata. Dammit, oh come on! how could he just left her with their son like that? He shouldn't have left! I cried , sobbed , everything. and today. eventually, this afternoon, after the Graduation thing and Farewell Party. I told my friends about my leaving to Singapore to study. They can't accept it totally. I was wrong too. I supposed to tell them weeks before it. Today was our last meeting, probably. but we still can meet or hang out perhaps? Yes, girlfriends and boyfriends? Pictures up very soon.

puh-lease, I can't hold my tears back anymore. I just cried and my make up was destroyed. Bravo, girls! You made me cry in the PUBLIC. Lols. Omg, seriously. I'll miss you guys. though sometimes you made me feel down and sad and mad.

Anyhoo, I'll get my iPhone 3Gs very soon. Thanks Mom and Dad! You guys are the greatest parents on th planet. I got my Macbook, iPod Classic and Now? iPhone. Yay! XD

Messages for my girls.

Natalia : Hope you read this carefully without blinking your eyes even once! Nah. So, Thank YOU for the days. you laughed with me. you listen to my problems. you argue with me about Kim Jae Joong. Lols! Hey, love DBSK back, won't you? and uhmm. Sorry for all the wrong things and If I'd ever treat you somehow, uhmmm. BAD? I apologized for that. Don't ever forget me leh. though I'm not by your side anymore. But then, honestly I treated you as my good friend already. (:

Veronica : I know, I know. You've always thought that I never treat people as my bestfriends. No, you got it wrong. I treat you as my bestfriend. ever since I was in your so-called 'inner-circle'; whatev. Seriously, I'll miss you although you're quite arrogant and stubborn at times. but then, for real. you're GREAT! and yes, brilliant! you have so much brilliant ideas and thought. wish you success for yr Fashion Design dream! Hwaiting! (:

Joselyn : Hey, what's DOWN, Jo? Lols. Hey, thanks for the days for being with me. we've been together for 2 yrs. and I'm glad to be your friend. and you're a nice friend too. sometimes, you're kinda choosy and picky. but, you're helpful and nice. I apologized for all i've done wrong to you. can you forgive me? oh, sure you can. ((: I know I'm too garrulous yes? I'm too noisy izzit? gah. how dare you commenting me that way. Lols. Nah. (: Honestly, I'll really really really miss you. remember our promise. Let's BUY iPhone!

Elizabeth : Hey, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. (Oh, should I sing Super Junior's Sorry-Sorry?) Hehes, I guess I've done the most faults to you, have I? You're assumed as my bff before. really. Because of some incidents. we're separated. I mean, not being bffs anymore. I wish I could be yr bff again. If I could turn back time. ): Anw, good luck for everything. I'll miss you!

Bryana : Hey, Kucing! Hello Kitty! That's your nickname. Well, although we're kinda close before. but we aren't that CLOSE anymore now. Idk why too. ): Ok, though we're not close. but I knew I got some mistakes done to you too, yes? Thanks and Sorry. Miss you! (: Don't worry, we still can meet?

Erlisna : Omg, my ex-bff. Hehehe. You're really nice to me. though sometimes being so arrogant and selfish. *slaps!* Hey, Thanks for everything and I'm very sorry for everything too. I knew I've ever disappoint you. definitely regret. >.<>

Fransisca : Although you've always being rude to me and harsh to me. I've never keep it in heart. I forgive you each time you being rude to me. Hahaha. Don't be too sad about my leaving. I'll definitely miss you guys always. keep in touch always, Bohai. LOL.

Sarah : Hoi, Hutabarat! Hohoho. I'll really miss you. I'll miss the bullies. Lols. It's fun to bully you, eh. (: anyhoo, i wish you all the greatest and seriously love you, friend! Stay brilliant and be a more confident singer in the future. I wanna see a singer named Sarah Yosephine Hutabarat in the future when I come back home to Medan. (:

I'll miss you guys seriously!!

Pictures , here. credit : VL.

2009-06-06T02:16:00.004+08:00

Oh his lips.

Another chapter of my dying session.

I don't know what I've been thinking of, I re-watch Heaven's Postman's kissing scenes though I know, my tears will formed again and my heart will be aching once again. Idk what the hell are my hands doing. They clicked on youtube on my bookmarks. then searched "Kim Jae Joong kissing scenes". I was so glad that finally my Baby Husband grew up to be more mature now. His acting is awesomely perfect! Bravo. On the other hand, my heart broke into million pieces, or even billion pieces. Whenever I imagine him kissing someone, I was like. What the hell. and shook my head real hard to erase those stuff. and NOW? it's reality. though its just a drama. but then, his 'virgin' lips touched another girl's lips! Idk how to describe my feeling rightnow. It was all mixed together like salad. Mad,Sad,Pathetic,Damned,Sick,Angry. all those. mixed in one. I'd never think of what will happen to me when one day I found out that he's married. Am I going to end my life by suicide? Laughs. I even don't know what I'm trying to say.

One thing, I'm pretty sure of.

I was deeply in love with Kim Jae Joong, that I don't want anyone to have him , EXCEPT me.

2009-06-04T00:51:00.002+08:00

I was dead, people .

Well, just tell you guys a simple one weird reason. I watched a video. a preview from Heaven's Postman, a drama. where Jaejoong played a male role in there. Yes, That's it. with Han Hyo Joo. I saw his Kissing Scene. I was dead, totally. cant catch up my breath. Somebody needs to do CPR to me. really. seriously. absolutely. totally. for heaven's sake. I dont want to watch the drama anymore. But I want to, but I never want to watch the kissing part. It was so heartbreaking. My eyes were wet actually. Tears almost poured out. I... felt really silly. His virgin lips, Omg. is mine! LOL. I must take a revenge. kill HHJ? Yes? Probably.

2009-05-27T18:36:00.002+08:00

DAMN NOT IN THE MOOD

Seriously, I got enough. really enough of my mother. she seriously made me scream my head off. I'm sick and tired. Yes I am. Idk how to describe my feelings now. between sad, angry, depressed, stressed, crazy, mad, numb. everything. I squealed. What I gg to do now is to bump my head onto the wall. I'm going crazy. She will always changed her heart. Idk whats in her mind. and to that BITCH. I.AM.GOING.TO.KILL.YOUUUUU. just wait for yr death this midnight.

2009-05-24T15:43:00.000+08:00

내 기억 속에 여전히 너는 내게 떠나달라고
더 이상 나를 버틸 수 없었겠지

ほら　舞い降りた雪がこの手に溶けては
まるで何もなかったように消えてく
ねえ　大切なことは壊れやすいから
僕たちにはつかめない　静かに漂うだけ

はるかな　はるかな　宇宙の片すみ
こうしてふたりが出会えた偶然
奇跡と呼びたいこの気持ちを　君だけに伝えたいよ

ただ　伝えたいことがうまく言えなくて
迷いながら　さがしながら　生きてた
いま　ひとつの光を見つけた気がして
追いかければ逃げてゆく　未来は落ち着かない

何度も何度も立ち止まりながら
笑顔と涙を積みかさねてゆく
ふたりが歩いたこの道のり　それだけが確かな真実

雨降るときには君の傘になろう
風吹くときには君の壁になろう
どんなに闇の深い夜でもかならず明日は来るから

春に咲く花や　夏の砂浜
秋の黄昏や　冬の陽だまり
いくつもいくつもの季節がめぐり
重ねあう祈りは　時空さえ超えてゆく

はるかな(宇宙の片すみにいて）
はるかな(想いをはせる）
奇跡と呼びたいこの気持ちを　ただ君だけに伝えたいよ

何度も何度も立ち止まりながら
笑顔と涙を積みかさねてゆく
ふたりが歩いたこの道のり　消え去ることはないから

雨降るときには君の傘になろう
風吹くときには君の壁になろう
どんなに闇の深い夜でも　かならず明日は来るから
君だけに　伝えたいよ　かならず明日は来るから

2009-05-23T14:41:00.009+08:00

감춰왔던 그대 마음을 이젠 볼 수 있게 해줘요
사랑하던 많은 날들의 기억이

I wrote a poem, I kind of picked some of those words in "Maze" lyrics. Which was sang by my alluring stunning husband, Kim Jae Joong (: Lmao, I never changed. Always this loyal to Jaejoong. I plugged my courage to post it here. Laughs. I hope the poem wasn't that bad, *Sobbing*. What do you think about this "Never feel Free" poem? Was it weird or maybe Great? *grins*

Never feel Free
-rushing through the wind and storm-

What is Freedom?
I never understand the word “Freedom”
Though It have been repeating in my head.
Just by the sunset
My footstep took me to the place I never know
I can’t come out anymore

Heaving a deep sigh
No one ever notice how lonely I am
I was always stuck into a place no one ever know
No one ever know where I am
It was the ‘Maze’ in my eyes.

Pretending not to notice that I was lost
My footstep brought me far, far away.
Into another part of the world I never knew
The rain began to fell above me
I looked up, I will never be free.

Sigh, next wednesday is the a doom for us, Semestral Assessment which was so sickining all time. I could see people in my class started to revise through and also, some of em doesn't even care about the coming Assessment. I was kinda scared and worried as well. I must get good scores. I MUST. Anyways, I watched "Vampire Knight" last night, which was totally. eww gross. Nah, kidding! It was so fucking amazing , I could tell! Soon fell for Zero, the Level E Vampire. Hmm, Kaname as well, the pureblood Vampire. He is so HOT. Zero is kinda aggressive, But I love him so.

Man, I was so busy day by day. I got tuitions everyday, everywhere. Really, I gone home real late everyday. seriously. my schedule is very full nowadays. I guess Im going to collapse soon cos I cant breathe! Oh dear, Im going to slim myself up! my weight increased AGAIN! Ok, to make things clear. Im not FAT or over weight. but I want my weight to be maximum 45kg! No less or more. Now, I'm almost 50! Screaaaaaaaaammmmm.

Ps, currently continue writing my aforementioned fanfic and some novels too. I was happy to write novels or whatever. I was happy to spill my thousand ideas out. ((:

A picture that gets smeared in white
And my fragrance that seems to have faded away
All get concealed by the glaring cloud

My heart that has no words
Slowly starts to move my feelings
Those times that slipped through
Are in my hands

I'm holding back the tears
I walk trying to lessen the weight of my heart
To a place that is neither close nor far
Where a different me stands
I will not cry

I bring my two hands together again
To a place that will hear it
As I live though these unmemorable times

Though it seems stupid, we’re always together
The pain that I want to let go
Dries the tears that flows through my body

I'm living with my tears
I walk trying to lessen the weight of my heart
To a place that is neither close nor far
Where a different me stands
I will not cry

I'm holding back the tears
I run adding to the weight of my faith
To a place that is neither high nor low
Where a different me stands again
With a small smile I can laugh

I love this lyrics so much, so touching. you should listen to the song in korean vers for sure. Omg, I love the words, damn real so touching. (:

街路樹を舞ってる　琥珀のleaf　風にさらわれてゆく
少し凍えている　小さな肩そっと　上着をかけた
君の優しい聲　君の無邪氣な顔
まるで陽だまりのようだから
いつまでも守りたいよ　僕の腕の中で
白い吐息　重ね合わせながら
溢れだすこの想いを　いま君に注いで
柔らかな時間を　心震わせて感じた
眞っ直ぐな言葉に　戶惑ってる君は　子猫のようさ
繫いだ手を强く　握り返し不意に　甘える素振り
希望滿ちる未來を　これからは一緖に
描いていけそうな氣がした
どこまでも羽ばたけるよ　君の夢を乘せて
過去の淚　拭いさってあげる
僕らを導くように　照らし出す光が
搖るぎなく深く　二人の想いを結んだ
時に君を見失いそうになっても
瞳閉じれば映る眞實
この季節が　あと何度　巡り來ても
變わらない　この愛を　僕は誓うよ
どこまでも羽ばたけるよ　君の夢を乘せて
過去の淚　拭いさってあげる
いつまでも守りたいよ　僕の腕の中で
白い吐息　重ね合わせながら
溢れだすこの想いを　いま君に注いで
柔らかな時間を　心震わせて感じた
淡い戀の詩　君だけにそっと歌うよ

가로수 주위를 맴도는 단풍잎 바람에 흩날려 가
조금 얼어 붙어 있는 작은 어깨에 살짝 겉옷을 걸쳐 줬지
네 다정한 목소리 네 천진난만한 얼굴
마치 햇살이 내리 비춰 주는 것 같아서
언제까지고 지켜 주고 싶어 내 가슴 안에서
새하얀 입김을 서로 불어가며
넘쳐 흐르는 이 추억을 지금 너를 향해
편안한 시간을 마음을 졸이며 만끽했어
직설적인 말에 당황 하는 넌 아기 고양이 같은 걸
잡고 있는 이 손을 세게 쥐며 아무렇지 않게 어리광 부리는 모습
희망이 넘치는 내일을 앞으로는 함께
그려 나갈 수 있을 것 같은 기분이 들었어
어디까지라도 날아갈 수 있어 네 꿈을 싣고
지난 날의 눈물 전부 닦아 줄게
우리들을 인도하듯이 비춰 주는 빛이
망설임 없이 깊게 우리들의 마음을 엮었지
때로는 널 잃어 버릴 것 같아도
눈을 감으면 떠오르는 진실
이 계절이 앞으로 몇 번이고 다시 찾아 와도
변하지 않는 이 사랑을 난 맹세해
어디까지라도 날아갈 수 있어 네 꿈을 싣고
지난 날의 눈물 전부 닦아 줄게
언제까지고 지켜 주고 싶어 내 가슴 안에서
새하얀 입김을 서로 불어가며
넘쳐 흐르는 이 추억을 지금 너를 향해
편안한 시간을 마음을 졸이며 만끽했어
조용한 사랑 노래를 너만을 위해 가만히 노래해

As autumn leaves are carried by the wind
I place a jacket on the cold shoulder next to me
It seems like your strong voice and innocent face
Is shined on by the sunlight

In my heart, I always want to protect you
When we speak to each other, the air we breathe is visible
These overflowing memories are all for you
Our pleasant times together will always rest in my mind

You resemble a kitten when you're surprised by words
When I take your hand, you try to act like you aren't bothered

Tomorrow is filled with dreams we will face together
I feel as though we're creating our own paths

How far can I fly with your dreams?
I will wipe away all your tears

The light shines on us, showing its approval
It has combined our feelings without hesitation

Honestly, I think I will lose you
The truth awakens when I close my eyes
No matter how many times this season aproaches me
I will always swear to this love, that will never change

How far can I fly with your dreams?
I will wipe away all your tears

In my heart, I always want to protect you
When we speak to each other, the air we breathe is visible
These overflowing memories are all for you
Our pleasant times together will always rest in my mind

For this silent love, I sing to you, only to you

English, Japanese and Korean lyrics. Which was attractively touching in my ears.

2009-05-16T20:37:00.002+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !
.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

I enjoyed my Kampung Ladang field trip today. play lotssa games though I dont play some of them. for some unexpected cases. But then, it was really a fun trip though, i must say. ps, that sucky guy loves to annoy me very much. Sighs! Well, something important to tell, Im having eyes bags!! though it were there ages ago. That were really the risk of sleeping hell late. I wont go to bed unless the midnight clock started to "ding dong"-ing.

Well, recently been thinking of what stuff should I bring to singapore. should I bring all my comics. which are tons of it? hmmm, *grins* should I bring DBSK posters? obviously, i would die without looking at their picture for one day. so yeahh i know im a dbskfreaker and a weirdo.

Yesterday, I get my new hairstyle. I was so happy with it anyhow. ^__^ ♥ Uhm, I watched "toGether" last night, Omfg, I cant believe that I would fall for Jiro, once again! Man, he's hot, cute, adorable, man, romantic, lovely!!! *screams*. Idk idk idk, dont ask me why. and HELL NO, Jaejoong is still my very first one in my heart! Laughs.

Oh.. I'm having my semestral assessment on th 28th May. I hate the subjects. mostly are hella sucky. But, no choice. I have to revise through the stuff. Omfg. I dont feel like doing it anyway. & God! I want a nikon cameraaaaa! my friends have it yesterday (they bought them together). I want it badly! Aish, when can I have it !?

SIDEKICK. will be released in my country in December. I gotta have it! Yes, pricey. but I must have it no matter what. I've been falling for it ever since I saw it when my friend showed it to me. Ok then, fluent babies. I gotta go for SOME THING. Well, tag me before. See yah.

2009-05-12T22:14:00.003+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !
.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Finally, the final decision had been confirmed. Yes, It was. I was so excited, by the end of june. I'll be moving to Singapore for studies. New Class starts on January 2010. I'm gg there earlier for the preparation thingy for the new students tests. Omg. Finally, Leaving my hometown is the happiest thing ever. Frankly, I despise my hometown alot. as I saw alot of bitches around the town wringgling and shaking their asses. and face damn hot lots of problems. It were real sickening. Finally, leaving. the best choice. though I'll really miss my Mom,Dad,Sister and Brothers. Well, takkaires! (:

I just can't bare this any longer. Those peepo just trying to reach my stage. Don't try me. Hey, I don't like yr fking attitudes, Stop behaving so childish. Stop acting like babies.

Once again,

Are you perfect enough to comment me that harsh?

What is "freedom"? What is "correct"?
I have a strange dream, a wandering shadow...
It seems I can see it but I can't see anything at all; it's an illusion

Being left behind in the hectic everyday,
Depressed and in a distorted time-line

* Rush ahead! Fly through the strong wind
To a place that's suffused in light and overflowing with hope
Picking up the pieces of a dream I once had,
I'll keep running down the path I believe in
In order to live true to myself

Shouldering the burden of both sins and retribution,
My spirit has withered away
The pouring rain soaks me,
As though it would wash away this destiny of hatred

I'm just wandering alone in this intricate maze
Searching for the place I belong

Fly high! Remember your instincts and embrace passion
Enough to tear the sky

Standing firmly on the rubble of lies,
In order to discover a yet unknown world, don't be afraid
Oh, my heart is crying out

To be "me"...

何が?自由」なのか
何が「正しい」のか
奇妙な夢見て彷徨う影
见えているようで
何も見えてない虚像

慌しい日常から追い越され
塞ぎこんでゆがんでる時間軸の中
駆け抜けろ光に満ちてる
希望をくれる場所
強い風を切って
壊れかけた「いつかの夢」を拾い集めながら
信じる道を走り続けよう
oh 僕らしく
生きていくため
罪と罚背负い
枯れ果てた心
降り注ぐ雨が仆を濡らす
憎しみの定め
洗い流していくように
入り组んだ迷路の中彷徨って
ただ独りで
たどり着く场所捜しながら
舞い上がれ炎が覚えてる情热抱きしめ
空を殴るくらい
伪りの壁踏みしめて
まだ知らない世界见つけ出すために
恐れたりしない
oh 叫んでる心のままに
駆け抜けろ光に満ちてる
希望をくれる場所
強い風を切って
壊れかけた「いつかの夢」を拾い集めながら
信じる道を走り続けよう
oh 僕らしく
生きていくため
走り続けよう

Omg, I was wondering why i liked this song so much (aside from the fact that i do love jaejoong's voice!) I was listening to the words, even though my japanese vocabulary is very very limited, and there was something about them that just struck me! now that i've read the translation i know what it is!! Though it was kinda old song (2007!), I still love it like hell. esp, whenever i watched the clip of Jaejoong concert singing maze. his voice. omg. Im pretty hell sure, I'll love Kim Jae Joong until I turn 20+!

2009-05-11T20:36:00.002+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !
.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

As what I'd promise, Here's the pictures of the concert of Tank. Apologized before. The pictures are not in good quality, so, yeaaaaa. Mianhae. ==". Here's some pictures that were taken close and far. LOLS. Before, there were two damn lucky girls who got up on stage. and have that "special moment" with Tank. one of the girls played a game, idk what game. its like sticking some round thing around her face and if she could drop those stuff down, she wins. Lastly, the green tee(green tea lah!) lady dropped those stuff down. most of em. so she won. She was allowed to take a photograph with Tank. but then she felt embarrassed w/ that kind of "kinda ugly" face cos of the sticky stuff. so Tank picked a tissue paper and clean the stain off from her face. Omo, I screamed. Yes. deep in my heart. I was kind of jealous, Hahah. Silly.

And another lucky girl. Tank has a song called "Du Chang Qing Ge" duet with Selina Ren from S.H.E, since he was invited ALONE. but he wants to sing that song. he asked the audiences, who was able to sing the song. many hands raised up. Then he finally picked the pinkie girl. Omo, they sang together up on stage. Somemore, Tank hold her hand for SOOOO long. Damn it. Hahaha. I imagined if I was up there and Tank was Kim Jae Joong, my lovely prince. Hahaha. That would be so perfect night to me. & I could have passed out before I reached up the stage. Lols, IF THE SCENE WAS JAEJOONG and ME. Lols. Hey, I love Jaejoong more and more day by day. Omg. ((: He is so lovable as always. that weirdo. Bwahaha.

Picturessssssss to share (: comments? Lol. just tag me there in my chatbox.

Tank played his guitar and sang "Gei Wo Ni De Ai", psps, I saw Jiro Da Dong. my "ex" on the Videoclip shown on screen, Babehs. LOL. Tank was totally amazingly awesome here. I screamed real loud and dont realized that many pairs of eyes glared at me. Lmaos. Who cares anyway? I love his songs. So.... >.<

The MCs and Tank discussed about the game thingy. Hah, If Im not mistaken, Yes.

After the game that caused my jealousy to burnt out, Here again. Tank played the piano. He sang "Wo Men Xiao Shi Hou", Omo, I love the song. AGAIN!

I need comments about these photos. Hahah. Please do tag before leaving, yes people?

Done, babes. ((: I never regret of seeing him in the concert. His songs are awesomely perfect. Just wishing that I could go for my DBSK 4th Live Tour Concert "The Secret Code" in Japan for four days. I would be so grateful and thank Jesus hundred times. Lmaos. Aiyah, Im gg to get the singles and "The Secret Code" album real soon. Ps, on the fancams. I saw Jaejoong act sexy. my nose bleeds soon after watching it. He is soooo smexy. Gah.

2009-05-10T22:30:00.004+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !
.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

I was so tired, I just get back home from my Brastagi Trip with my family. I love the trip damn much cos I love spending time with em. though sometimes they loved to nag. but still, well. the trip was fun. Well, I kind of saw TANK's Live concert last night. I gotta admit that It was so amazing. TANK was awesomely friendly. I shook his hand once!! (: Idk why I get so excited though I was not even a fan of him (But I am, now). He is a good singer though he might not have that "good" look. Enjoy the show super much. (Well, pictures coming soon)

& Went home, ate tomyam friedrice, then continue with my lappy white watching Under Dog and Beverly Hills Chihuahua. (:

For SOME people. dont ever think that you can step on me like that. dont reach my stage, yea. im not kidding you guys. im fucking serious this time. I dont wanna find any probs with any of you. you guys are not on the same level as me. gee, you guys are LOW BASTARDS. i'd never have this kind of friends like you guys. OMFG. shame on you.

"Believing on you guys just make me felt dumber day by day." Lmao, Oh i see. Was that all you mean? I was so wrong to think that you were a good people to trust. But I was utterly wrong. I can't bare this any longer. Don't reach my stage alrights. I've treated you soo good yet what you treat me? Look, I know you dislike me from the first place. You just pretended to like me but you don't. Stop pretending. Yes, Me either. I've been waiting for so long, for something to change. But I dont see any changes? You love to treat me bad. I've always assumed that as jokes. though you were real tough serious. Damn. Oh yes, I think, you are more annoying than me. please please, pick a mirror and look at yrself inside th mirror.

Are you perfect?

2009-05-08T23:28:00.001+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !
.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Like I said before, Friendship is the same as Friendshit. well, not referring to 'all'. just to some peepo which i had assumed them as my friends. well, Hahah. Look, I had never find problems with them yet they started it before me. Seriously, goddamn ass people. Im tired. those people I assumed as my besties are utter shits. It's so pathetic you see. Friends know each other well and wont find problems with one another. But? Sigh, what they did?

Ok. I wont think about them anymore. those wicked human beings. Ok, they're not human beings. Omg, Idk what words to describe them. They are worse than those witches? Its not that I love to find problems. NO. I wont start if they dont start it at the first place.

1 more month, baby. just stay alive til that day comes.

2009-05-06T20:37:00.002+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

We had our Social Studies competition this morning which was held at the MPH. Enjoy the show so much. Enjoy the score-battling so much. (: exciting yet share lots of knowledge toos. Yes Yes. Omg, I learned alot of korean grammar so far. Love it (: Its a self learn though. Nth more to share. just some pictures. ((:

omfg, i was shit bored. nth interesting to be posted here. so, that's that. au revoir!

2009-05-02T19:21:00.006+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

After my math tuition then headed to SP with family. get my stupid ipod fixed. bought lottsa korean dictionaries and guide books & french aswell. Love it currently. ((: then VL, EC, MW, B came and meet me at G. & headed to Kfc. cos I haven eaten my lunch yet. my stomach had been screaming out my name to let some food in. :X after few hours. I went home.

This is kinda unexpecting. Let me tell you the whole shit happens from the first. We actually planned to go Brastagi Highland next saturday. and we made a deal. they rent their own villa and stay there, and they needa pay the bus fee, bbq food fee and renting fee. I wasnt included on those. just fr bbq maybe. they agreed firstly. (VL agreed), but then, today. this afternoon, a few minutes I arrived home. they asked me to pay fr the rent and food. Ok, I surely will pay fr the food. but rent? why? I have my own villa and why should I live in other place which wasnt FOC instead of living in my own villa? For fucking sure, my mom wont allow me too. How could they be so selfish? & duressed me that way?

You know what they threat? "If you dont pay fr the rent, don't step into our villa." Lmaos, even my ass laughed at them. Fine, I will fking NO enter your fking wretched villa. teehee. forget about the bbq thing. i guess i wont be joining them.and J thinks the same thoughts too. The peepo i thought were my true friends were actually the wicked peepo i ever knew. Fine, wanna end the friendship? Ok. I wont mind. 1 more month to go. (: I'm so excited for that day.

Currently in love with ♥ SIDEKICK.

have a uber superb day, supercupcakes .

2009-05-01T19:52:00.003+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Ytd we watched "X-MEN ORIGINS; WOLVERINE" at theatre after hang out. Love it soo. Logan, Omo ((: SO awesome. slightly screamed when the battles between him and the other XMEN (or whatever) started. Hahs. Omo.

So, today today today. I'm fucking bored. I done nth besides sign in and sign out facebook and msn. -since i was a newbie on facebook. i done nth with it-, not in the mood actually. Lastnight I chatted with "him" on msn. I felt kind of annoyed by his insults. Kept on saying "those", Makes me wanna cut his head off. Uhm, since I was shit bored. I mind my own ass business/ DBSK business. saw an anti-fans forum. Interesting... I viewed. Then my blood kinda boiled up. Why are those haters kept writing rude stuff to dbsk? and why cassies (me) are included as well? Hey, we done nth wrong with those fuckers. We wont scold em unless they start the whole shit. I laughed at em. so retarded and lame. anti-fans have so much spare time to spam other fans' blog who wrote things bout dbsk. kept saying dbsk ; DBSGAY? hahs. Funny. just because they watched ONE MV of dboys. Balloons. I knew the MV was kinda kiddo. but they didnt show any gay moves in the MV. The MV shows you that the adults wishes that they were kids again or the childhood thing, probably. thats it. no guy stuff. Omo, do those antis got smth wrong with their eyes? and BRAINS? Whatever. Just dont care bout those antis , cassies .

Look at this man, he's CHUNG LIM. a korean newbie. i love his dances. so alive and i found it catchy. he's kinda flirty as well. Loves him loadhs (:

2009-04-30T20:01:00.000+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Happy 15th Birthday to Michael ! ♥ 생일 축하해 ~ we made a video for him, I guess he was quite touched with the video content as well. ~ Haih, Today is lovely, I hung out with my friends again at SP. MW, VL, EC, B, AL, T, K, AO, EM, SY. We met at KFC and I had my fries as my lunch. I'm on diet (: because my weight for now is 48! I'm shocked as well. my weight should be 45 or 46 which is suitable with my height. (157cm)!!

EM and SY separated frm us as they're going to watch movie at theatre. AO, K, AL, T left to the Amazone. Played games or whatsoever. while the 'left ones' went to Gramedia to search some books. I bought somemore Korean dictionary and guide & Japanese dictionary too. I'm damn happy. Afterward, we watch movie as well. We watched "X-MEN ORIGINS WOLVERINE" smth like tt bah. I forgot the title alrd. Short memory. ): Love it so much! But dislike the ending. He lost his memories. So Sad...

Tmr no school, Hooraye. Ps, today was the last day of the UN exams. I'm quite happy and relaxed now as I will watch many korean dramas tonight (((:

2009-04-29T12:33:00.009+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Yes, I know I know. I was always wrong and you were always th right ones. You had never done any wrongs in your whole fucking life. geez, alright. I know. I've been so patient to you and yet, now you guys were trying to step on me. Oh, great. SHAME ON YOU! Have I told you before? Mind your own fucking business rather than minding others' business. Rmb what I've suggested you? Buy a mirror for heaven's sake. Sigh sigh sigh. Well, I guess you won't understand what I said. Because, maybe. you're not a human being. Please, Be more HUMAN. I bet you got no brain inside your big head. Your head is full of shit! Think please before taking an action. Oh, sorry. I forgot that you have no brain inside there. Kept on mocking as you like. Nvm, nvm. Once you reached all my patient, You'll see what will I do to you this fucking blokes and sluts.

Ok, I need to calm myself down. So, today is the third day of our National Examination, alright. Math paper fr today and I finished it quite fast. Science paper fr tmr. Wish me luck, peepo! Im pretty sure I would pass the examination and earn the proudness certificate real soon. teehee.

LASTLY, copymeows, shoo off! copying my style of blogging isn't a good idea at all. Don't you have your own style? Or, you got no style, huh? Haha, pity you.

So Pretty x3

iPod Touch and Blackberry Bold. YAY! Gonna buy them real soon. Perhaps, September. On My Birthday or Maybe November :)

Blackberry Bold 9000 and iPod Touch 32GB

2009-04-28T20:56:00.005+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

I started to feel that my school life kinda sucks to me. Friends are fine, they are awesome friends. But Idk why I felt something unreasonable like this. Some more, I can feel that some of th peeps there were jealous of me. Idk what. maybe my talent or whatsoever (smirk proudly). Look, I can draw many types of sketches, anime, manymore. And, I speak fluent english, chinese. korean and some japanese. Hahas. Imma not trying to boast myself or what. But thats the fact, cos I DONT WANT PEOPLE TO LOOK DOWN ON ME. I wanna show em that I AM better than them! Hey, Its not that I'm such a boastful person. Yes, some people commented that I'm useless. No talent. OMFG. Don't they got a mirror at their homes? I suggest them to buy one then... Stop insulting and judging. Anw, tday was th second day of the UN exam. tmr, we're gonna face Math. See whether I can done it without sweating. LMAO.

2009-04-27T14:33:00.003+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Footstep 발걸음 영웅재중

해질무렵날 끌고간 발걸음 눈떠보니 잊은줄 알았던곳에 아직도 너에 대한미움이 남아 있는지 이젠 자유롭고 싶어 시간은 해결해 주리라 난 믿었지 그것조차 어리석었을까 이젠 흘러가는 대로날 맡길래 너완 상관없잖니 처음부터 너란 존재는내겐 없었어 니가 내게 했듯이 기억해 내가 아파했던 만큼 언젠간 너도나아닌 누구에게이런 아픔 겪을테니 미안해 이렇게 밖에 할수없잖니 정말 이럴수 밖에 너처럼 다시 시작할수 있는그날이 오길 너를 사랑할수 없고너를 미워해야 하는날 위해. 처음부터 너란 존재는내겐 없었어 니가 내게 했듯이 기억해 내가 아파했던 만큼 언젠간 너도나아닌 누구에게이런 아픔 겪을테니 미안해 이렇게 밖에 할수없잖니 정말 이럴수 밖에 너처럼 다시 시작할수 있는그날이 오길 너를 사랑할수 없고너를 미워해야 하는날 위해 ~ 재중이... ♥ I love this song super much. Your voice is always so angelic to my ears. Damn, you're soo soo soo M.I.N.E ~ Anw, had my National Exams this morning from 8 to 10. I done it without sweating. LOL. Good news fr myself toos. I'd forgotten about "HIM" utterly. I had tried, seriously. and succeed. (:

2009-04-22T20:03:00.003+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

Good thing, We were friends again last night. We chatted on msn, texted til midnight (til i fell a sleep), But I hardly accept the fact of he has a new 'girlfriend' alrd. I missed the time, just like before. We were very close. texting every single minutes, LOL. joke alot. mock alot. I miss the time, seriously. But, I guess he doesnt realize that, or he pretends to 'not knowing' abt the case. Probably his friends who had found out that I had feelings for him, told him earlier. Why does he treating me this cold and chill? I just, Dont understand. Alright then, Nvms. Just stay calm for 2 more months. Uh-huh, I'd get my REAL boyfriend later on. By that time, I'll forget him utterly. If I could.. cos, each time I try to erase the memory of the both of us, the more I couldnt forget him, Idk why myself either...

2009-04-20T19:21:00.009+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

OMO, i had a serious headache today. some of the guys bullied me! (or most probably seduced me) LMAO. Just felt so annoyed anyway. & I get some unexpected rumors about my friends. Really so unexpected thing to be heard. Hahah. But congrats them. LOL. To tell you guys the truth, ytd I was so heart broken. and felt so numb. no more feelings and anything else inside me. I texted him, I knew he wont reply anyway, though there's still a small hope. But he doesnt reply my msg. I was so down. Cant sleep well. So today, just by the recess time. Im super HAPPY and relieved. He said he doesnt received my texting. Screams! I was so happy, I swear. :) He is my Happy Pill. Hohoho : ) ♥(s)

"That day when the sun set, My Footsteps took me.

Opening my eyes to a place i thought i had forgotten.

Whether I still have some hatred towards you left
I want to be free now...

I believed time would solve everything.
Was that in itself a foolish belief?
Now, I want to just go with the flow of things.
It doesn't matter to you anymore.

[Chorus]

From the start a person like you..
Never existed to me the way I didn't to you
Remember one day, you'll hurt as much as i did
From someone other than myself
You'll experience the same pain

I'm sorry, this is all I can do
Really, it's the only way I can be
For that day to come,
When i can start over like you
For me, who can't love you
And can't help but hate you"

Footsteps (by Kim Jae Joong) , English translation. p.s. I LOVE THIS SONG! It reminds me on someone, and some incidents happened between us in an early times. I missed the time we were 'that' close as though we're in a relation ship. Still, I should have forget about this stuff. It will hurt me more day by day I kept thinking about it. I knew he was no longer mine. Yes, though scars still remain in my heart. I should and I must let the feelings toward him vanished by itself. But I wish to let him know, and I wish to tell him that I love him now. seriously.

2009-04-18T23:59:00.005+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

SUPER FUN!
I had my math tuition this morning. Then headed to VL's hse, while waiting for EC and MW, we watched Donald Duck. Lmaos. I've stopped watching it since I was in Primary 3 or 4. Hehes. So EC arrived then headed to Socrates Vegetarian Restaurant. Shit, I planned to buy dvds today but canceled, since It haven open yet when I reached there. Holy SHIT!.

And Oh my HOLY ANGEL. AJ and Chung Lim and Tae Goon are so super hot. esp Chung Lim. their dance moves. was like mix elements of Se7en and Rain. can imagine how cool was that? Uhm, ok, so after havin our lunch at Socrates, went back to VL's hse to have our another math tuition. private tuition. Then drove off to GP, hang out with KK, KO, MW, VL, EC, B! Super fun!, watched HALLOWEEN. scream out loud, peeps. I swear I dont wanna watch that kind of movies anymore. damn thrilling alrights. I hate seeing blood and killing and Idk what. SO CREEPY. I ran out before it finished. We have our dinner then I walked to the WBenteng for th ceremony thing with MW, then VL & EC followed. Now I'm homed. LOL. =)

I surfed allkpop again, and GOT a rumour again. Park Seo Jin (a new debut singer of Pink Heart) was only 15 and she took the semi nude modelling. OMFG. she was only my age and It was so wrong for her to do that kind of photoshoots. Seriously, what was she thinking? who the fuck are her parents? allowing her doing such sexual photoshoots. look at her sex pose with that man. and Fuck, no boobs? Haha. who's interested? though she looked good. Anw, not trying to insult. but I just cant stand any more. LOL. Soon, there will be 12 year olds bouncing around in mini skirts. Just, awkward.

2009-04-15T20:56:00.003+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

2 More Weeks to the Creepy National Examination. Some busy studying, some seems not even care, some seems fine. Well, I, My self, felt kinda scared toos. I just dk what to study. I'm wondering around my ass. This saturday Im out again with my girlfriends & boyfriends. Excited. That will be great to spend somemore time w those biatches. Hohoho. I wanna buy some DVDs too. but that was such a waste of money. Lol. & I planned to shorten my hair. But on the other hand, I want to grow it long. & Fuck, I was like dying to grow my body taller. Please, Please, Please! Most of my friends are taller than me. (I exaggerate it, Only 2 girls who are taller than me), But then most teenagers my age are way taller than ME. Sobs, HAHA. Ok, who the fuck that cares? At least, Im not as fat and my face is SUPER CLEAN. aka, no pimples at all :) LMAO. kidding. Ok, wish me luck for my tmr's practical exams.

2009-04-12T21:48:00.003+08:00

こんにちは; ハロー君たちは偉大であるべきです !

.이봐요; 여보세요; 안녕.

I was shit bored. I woke up @ 9+, got nothing to do. watched Sassy Girl & cried like a running tap when it comes to the sorrow scenes. LOL. went out @ arnd 11, then came back at 12.59. Hahs, Lmaos, for real. I was super bored now. It was 9.08 PM. and I got NOTHING to kill time.

I was planning to grow my hair longer. at least until it reaches my hips. Hahs. :X Alrights then, short post for today. Gonna have my practical exam fr tmr. Wish me luck, peeps. Just yell a "Hwaiting" for me. Hahs. Nah, I need Jae to say so. & For some girls who were SUPER annoying and so short-minded. Please? Do buy a mirror for each of you. Or maybe If you dont get any mirror at your house then, I suggest you to buy one? You know very well that I love my way and my style. stop judging? Have you ever think of YOUR OWN LOOK first? Lmaos. so before judging someone else. Do LOOK at your self first yeas? At least, I think that IM THOUSAND TIMES BETTER THAN YOU, Old Witch. & Please take note : "Instead of minding others business, Mind your own fuck ass business."